


Our Little Secret

by delorita, SilverFountains



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Baby Kíli, Brother-Sister Relationships, Brother/Brother Incest, F/M, Family Fluff, Family Secrets, First Kiss, Heterosexual Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Loss of Virginity, Love Confessions, M/M, Parent Thorin, Pregnant Sex, Rare Pairings, Sex, Sibling Incest, Sibling Love, Surprises, True Love, Underage Kissing, Unplanned Pregnancy, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-24
Updated: 2015-09-19
Packaged: 2018-03-31 23:56:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 34,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3998071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delorita/pseuds/delorita, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverFountains/pseuds/SilverFountains
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Dis found herself out on the street with her three-year-old son her brother had immediately offered them a place to stay until she was back on her feet. But now that they live together in such close proximity again old forbidden feelings are quickly rekindled. </p><p>Okay, this has become much more than a oneshot as we originally wrote it.</p><p>Inspired by the lyrics of Avicii - "Hey Brother"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Thorin rubs his face as he's bent over his paperwork. The only light in his room that of his desk lamp. He's lost track of time long after Fili had been sent to bed. At some point his sister had called goodnight to him and he had called a mumbled response back but even that was at least an hour ago. The house is silent now apart from the scratching of his pen and the occasional tapping onto his laptop keyboard. He knows sleep is pleading quietly for him to close his books and slide under the duvet. But his mind is churning too quickly still and he knows he'll lie awake for hours only to eventually get back up again; in which case he might as well not bother in the first place.

Dis lies wide awake in her bed as usual wondering what the future will bring after her divorce from Fili’s father. She’s so very grateful for her big brother for having taken her and the little three-year-old into his house after her mad husband has thrown her out.

She huffs and gets up again, pulling on her dressing gown over her nightgown to go into the kitchen to make herself some soothing tea. That's when she sees the light under the door to Thorin's room. She hesitates for just a moment and then opens the door slowly, wondering why he is still up as well.   

Thorin is startled from his thoughts when his sister appears in the doorway. "Dizzy? What are you doing up?" He blinks at her appearance. That almost haunted look that she's had since all the trouble happened. And yet even despite - or maybe because -of the lines of worry around her eyes she's still the beautiful strong woman that he's always admired. "Are you alright?"

Dis instantly feels better hearing her beloved big brother call her by the nickname he's invented for her. His deep soothing voice a balm for her wounds. She shakes her head a little and sits on the edge of the bed. "Can't sleep." 

Thorin gets to his feet and gives his sister a warm smile. "Me neither." He sits down next to her and takes her  hand in his large ones. "Would you like to talk about what's troubling you?" he offers.

"I don't know." She loves his comforting closeness and leans her head against his shoulder, as she always has done. "What about you? You're still up yourself." She looks back into his caring eyes.

"Just work," Thorin shrugs. "I won't bore you with it. Although it probably would send you to sleep," he chuckles softly and reaches out to brush a loose curl behind her ear. "I know things have not been easy for you. But I want you to know that I've enjoyed having you and Fili in the house," he admits. "It's nice to come home to you instead of an empty house. And Fili is such a sweet little boy. You've raised him well," he praises as he gazes deep into her big brown eyes."

Dis mirrors her brother's gesture, stroking one of his stray strands of long hair out of his face. "I'm happy to hear that. Thanks. I hope we can stay a while longer." She looks down embarrassed. "I'm not sure how fast I can make enough money with my new job to support me and little Fee." She snuggles against Thorin's broad chest, sighing deeply.

"Hey, no worries about that!" Thorin says sternly, kissing her head softly as he wraps his arms around his sister, pulling her close. "We talked about this. You can stay for as long as you'd like and you do not need to worry about money. I will not have it." He tilts her head to look up at him. "Agreed?" He smiles into her sweet face, finding this strange yet pleasant warmth spread through him as they share this intimate moment.

Dis blinks. “I don’t know how I can thank you, big brother.” She sneaks her arms around his waist, feeling so wonderfully safely enveloped in his strong embrace. She stares into those incredible blue-grey eyes, murmuring, “You are so very kind to us,” and gently brushes her lips against his cheek.

"Don't be silly," Thorin murmurs back. Dis feels so comfortable in his arms like this. So natural. Just like when they were teenagers and used to snuggle up together like this. "You're my sister. I'd do anything for you." He strokes her cheek, the skin so soft under his fingertips and he just has to lean in closer.

“One part of me wishes you wouldn’t be my brother...” She whispers softly and gently kisses him on his lips, hidden in his beautiful beard. Her hands caressing his face. She feels so very drawn to him it hurts inside not to touch.

Thorin blinks. He's surprised that Dis has actually kissed him even if he had more or less invited the gesture. The tip of his tongue flicks across his bottom lip where that fleeting kiss still burns. "You wish I was not your brother... for you want to kiss with me?" he whispers thickly.

She can only nod, tears jumping to her eyes. “You make me feel so safe, Thorin. I don’t want anybody near me but you.” She admits a secret she holds in her heart since a long time.

Her brother swallows hard. His heart beat sounds deafening in his ears suddenly. He's harboured such strong feelings for this beautiful woman for as long as he can remember. And they'd always been close. Even at an age when it was long past the point of appropriate she would still crawl under the duvet with him. _But she is your sister! This is wrong!_

But even though his brain is telling him this loud and clear all he can see in his arms is the only woman he's ever truly loved.

"You are everything to me, Dizzy," he says softly, cupping her face in his hands. "But you are fragile right now. I don't want you to regret this later. Are you sure this is what you want?" 

“Kiss me please.” Dis says in a voice that is not truly her own. She pulls his head towards her, touching her lips against his again. “I know what you are thinking. But to us, it is not wrong.” She says under her breath, sliding her fingers through that long hair she admires so much.

This time Thorin answers the kiss, tentatively at first, allowing her to change her mind and pull away. But when she doesn't, when instead Dis wraps her arms around him and pulls him in even closer, he finally gives in to those long forbidden feelings.

“My Thorin.” She breaks the kiss briefly but then initiates it anew, gently pushing her tongue past his lips, searching, begging for his to touch hers. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck as to never let go again.

The utterance of those words makes Thorin's whole body tingle as much as that deep kiss. He allows his tongue to play with hers, dancing against each other with growing passion. His one hand gently wraps around the back of her neck, digging into her lovely long curls. The other slides down her back, caressing her tenderly, pulling her as close as possible.

When they finally break that kiss that surely had been boiling between them for decades he is panting. "Oh Dizzy, my beautiful sister. I've wanted to do this for so long," he admits.

“So did I...” She caresses his beard with both her hands. “I thought marrying, having a child, would erase these forbidden feelings for you, dearest brother.” Another, lingering kiss. “But it did not. On the contrary, it made me yearn for you even more.” She gently puts their foreheads together, sighing. “What now? I don’t want to let go of you.”

Thorin lies himself down on the duvet on the bed and gently pulls his beloved sister next to him. "I wished you all the happiness in the world with him, I really did. But every moment I wished also that it could have been me. And when I saw how he treated you... I know this is wrong. I know we can never be together. But I love you so very much, my sweet girl. And I want to make you happy. You deserve to be happy." He strokes her face softly again and then kisses the tip of her nose.

“I’m really in love with you my dearest brother.” She just has to kiss him again. “Always have been.” She roams her hand across his broad chest, feeling his muscles play beneath the thin t-shirt. “Never wanted to admit it to myself. Never understanding why people preach that sibling love is wrong when _supposed love_ in marriage is such a fake thing.” She lies on her back and tries to pull him on top of herself.

"Let me love you," Thorin whispers as he presses her down into the mattress under his weight. He presses little butterfly kisses along her neck. "This is about us, right? We want this..." he reassures them both. "It is no-one else's business," he mutters through more little kisses.

“Yes! Oh yes, we want this…” Dis breathes in bliss. Thorin’s lips constantly on her skin sending little tremors through her whole body. She wraps her arms and legs tightly around him. “No one must know.”

"No one needs to know," Thorin agrees, his voice even deeper now, his breathing a little faster as he can feel himself harden already. "Can... May I... " He presses himself up a little to push the dressing gown out of the way to show the beautiful erotic outline of Dis' curves through her nightgown. He slowly lets his fingers circle her collarbones as he awaits her permission.

“Make love to me, my Thorin, please, as I want to make love to you, with all my heart, body and soul.” She curves her body up towards his, feeling his trapped hardness in his jeans press against her thigh. The fact that he wants her just the way she so desperately wants him, makes her shudder all over.

Thorin lets out a soft groan. He moves his hand slowly along the curve of her side, inwards, over her soft stomach first and then real slowly along the outline of her breasts. He rolls his hips just a little, rubbing his confined erection against her thighs where the gown has ridden up now."I want to make you feel so loved. So desired."

“I desire you, my hot, sexy brother.” Dis breathes against his neck, nuzzling her nose into his hair. Her hands pulling off his t-shirt so she can finally slide her palms over the warm, smooth skin of his back. “I love you.”

"I love you too," Thorin whispers huskily, pressing their lips together again. "I've always loved you, adored you." He mimics her motion by pulling her short nightgown up to reveal her body underneath. "You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen," he says reverently, letting his eyes roam that slightly olive skin, from those perfect breasts down to her black knickers and up again to her chest. And he bends down to kiss her gently between those soft globes.

Dis sighs very deeply. A “Finally” escaping her. She arches up from the bed, into her brother’s gentle touch. Her legs twining with his still clothed ones. She caresses her fingertips down Thorin’s spine, breathing deeply, then around the waistband of his jeans to pop the button in front, sliding a hand adoringly across that growing bulge there.

"You really want to do this?" Thorin asks one last time. "You want us to make love?" He continues to place kisses were he can reach her super soft skin, his one hand moving to circle her nipple lovingly. Every touch is making him harder, making him want her more. But this is huge! They can never undo this forbidden act if they decide to go ahead with what their hearts have already agreed to. 

“Yes, I want us to make love.” She pants against his lips, drowning in his loving gaze. “I’m taking the pill, nothing can happen.” Dis traces his moustache with her fingertip, knowing that due to Thorin’s he gets tested for every possible illness regularly. “Love me.” She whispers against his lips and into his mouth as she slides his zipper down and rubs his hardness with the heel of her hand.

“Oh little Dizzy …” Thorin moans against the curve of her breast. He needs to be free of these clothes and he rolls himself off his sister and pulls his briefs down together with his jeans, setting his now aching hardness free. When he looks back at Dis he finds she has followed his lead just as quickly except for her cotton panties.  And he reaches out to pull them down reverently, his eyes never leaving hers. “Mm, you are just gorgeous,” he says quietly, his voice but a low rumble now, before he scoops her back in his arms, finally feeling her naked skin pressed against his own.

Dis feels like a wave of electricity has hit her when she senses her brother’s hot, nude skin against his. “Oh god, Thorin, I dreamed about this...” She now kisses him everywhere she can reach. Sliding her tongue through his beautiful dark chest hair, caressing his nipples. Her hands moving down to his firm backside, first hesitantly, but then more brave. “You are gorgeous, beloved brother.” She knows she should take it much slower, but she just lets her legs slide apart of their own accord. Inviting him.

“Oh my beautiful girl," Thorin groans a little louder now, his hands roaming faster, his mouth kissing more urgently, more greedily. He buries his face against her breasts again, loving how soft and perfect they feel against his lips. His hand maps out every part of her perfect body, with all the curves that a mother should have, stomach no longer flat, hips full; he just loves the signs of her maturity and of her life’s story so perfectly reflected in every part he touches. When she opens her legs he lets his hand wander down, fingers playing for a moment with the coarse hair before he dips them into that searing warmth, hearing his beloved sibling groan wantonly as he feels around her wetness.

“Oh my god, YES!” Dis welcomes her brother’s fingers deep inside her. He’s caressing her just right and she moves towards him, contracting her inner muscles a little, feeling all super sensitive and aroused, dripping wet; something she’d never been for her husband. His lips against her breast make her nipples stand like little hard nubs, wanting more, _needing_ him. But she moves up a little and whispers, “Let me touch you first. I’ve so often dreamed about your...sword...and it looks… _mouth-watering.”_ She can’t take her eyes off Thorin’s heavily erected cock. Forbidden dreams coming true.

Thorin grins at his little sister’s words, at the way she is lusting for him, licking her lips just a little as her eyes slide over his manhood when he displays himself more for her. “Please,” he pleads. “You have no idea how I imagined it was your hand instead of my own when I lay alone in bed at night,” he admits. His whole body feels on fire with anticipation and his crown is throbbing pleasantly.

“You imagined me doing this?” Dis bats her eyelashes at him, suddenly feeling playful and knowing they have all the time in the world to fulfil their dreams. She kneels up opposite Thorin and lets her fingertips slide tentatively across his taut flesh, her eyes alternately watching his beautiful face and his manhood, of which she’d only got glimpses of when they were way younger.

“YES …” Thorin has to bite his lip not to groan too loudly when he finally feels those lovely sleek hands touching him where he had always wanted to feel them but never thought he would. He moves his own hand again, stroking Dis’ thighs firmly first. Then he returns them to her sweet velvety warmth, playing with all those forbidden pleasures there, feeling for the place that would give her the most pleasure. He closes his eyes, letting all these amazing feelings take over.

Dis’ whole body shudders when Thorin brushes her clit with his fingertips. She’s all swollen for him and moans, moving forward a little so she can kiss him again deeply, while wrapping one of her hands around his hard shaft, and with the other cradling his balls. Something she’s never done to any other man. But it just feels right to do it for her beloved big brother. She wants to touch him _everywhere_.

“You touch me so nice, my princess,” Thorin smiles in his sweet sister’s face. “Does this feel nice for you too?”

“Very, my prince.” She smiles and nods. “There are so many things I would like you to do to me, now that we’ve come so far.” She whispers, stroking him slowly. “And so many I would love to do to you…”

“Tell me what you would like me to do to you,” Thorin whispers back against her lips. “I want to spoil you, give you every pleasure you desire.” They may never have the guts to do this again after tonight and if this is to become just a memory he wants it to become the most mind blowing one for both of them.

“I… I think ...I cannot tell…” _It’s too dirty._ She says no more and bends down slowly, licking her tongue right across that glistening slit of her brother’s cock head.

“Oompf … oh Dis, that’s …” Thorin can feel his eyes roll back in pure pleasure, but when he opens them again he frowns. “You can tell me anything, my sweetest. Anything. Please, have no secrets from me.” _What on earth could be worse than wanting to bed your own brother?_ it flits through his head and he is truly intrigued now.

“Well,” She stops her ministrations, keeping her hand there firmly and sliding her fingers of the other hand through Thorin’s tempting chest hair. “My...favourite fantasy about us is...that I do what I just did and you do kind of the same to me.” She laughs a little embarrassed. “At the same time. I don’t even know if that is possible... “

Thorin draws in a slow breath at the suggestion then he grins, kissing his lovely sibling hard. “You are perfect in every way.” Then he moves himself around on the bed without any further hesitation and presses a gentle kiss onto that perfectly groomed triangle, drinking in her unique scent. He teases his fingers between her legs again, feeling now more confident in touching that soft wet pleasure. He smiles to himself as he buries his head against that moist flower, pressing little kisses there first, listening out for his sister’s response.

“Ahhhwww oh yes please Thorin yes, right there oh my gooood…” Dis didn’t know she was that responsive in bed. Well, except when she was dreaming of him doing all these things to her. She bucks her pelvis towards his mouth, wanting more of those lips, the scratch of his beard there, his agile tongue. At the same time she engulfs his perfect cock head fully with her mouth, sucking gently, rubbing his strong thighs with her hands.

Thorin’s head is spinning with all these wonderful sensations. The warm wetness wrapped around his cock is just utterly delightful and he realises just how long it must have been that he last had a blowjob. Equally giving his sweetheart oral pleasure in return is setting his skin on fire. He sticks his tongue out and licks slowly along her slit, tasting her sweet juices. Then he lets his tongue twirl around her clit as his fingers had before, pressing the flat of his tongue against that little pleasure button.

Dis climaxes right there and then. Having her brother press and circle his tongue so expertly around her sweet point is so extraordinary perfect it makes her squirm and moan around his cock, never letting him go during the process. Her clit pulsing and sending sparks through her whole body.

Thorin smirks in surprise as Dis bucks against him, feeling a gulf of warm juice moisten her whole area. He laps at her more until she writhes violently against his tongue. He loves the fact that she still has him in her mouth, still sucks at him through her own orgasm. “Blimey sis,” he grins as he plunges his fingers into her now soaking wet cavern, “that did not take much.”

She lets Thorin go to get some air into her lungs, breathing harshly. “You seem to know how to press my pleasure buttons.” Dis slowly moves away from him and turns herself around, facing him happily.

Smiling back almost smugly, Thorin strokes her flushed face tenderly. “That’s good, for I like playing with your pleasure buttons.” He refrains from kissing her on the mouth, not sure how she would feel about that since her intimate taste lies on his lips. But he kisses her neck again as he moves her into position underneath him. “I love you so very much, my beautiful princess,” he smiles again, heatedly, his cockhead throbbing heavily now as he lines himself up with her sweet cave.

She opens her legs willingly, wide, waiting for him, yearning, wanting her brother, needing him like air. “Make love to me, my Thorin,” she repeats, pulling his head down towards her for a deep kiss, not caring where his tongue has been before.

The fact that his sister kisses him so deeply, combined with her words, is putting all his nerve endings in heat. Thorin rolls his hips down and forward and he moans a very deep throated moan into his sister’s mouth as he enters her scorching hot body. “Oh my lovely Dizzy, he manages to utter in between panting kisses. “You’re so hot. So lovely.”

“I love you so much, so very much, brother, beloved.” She sobs against his lips, carding her fingers through his now sweaty hair, rolling up her hips to feel him as deep inside her as possible, holding him towards her with her arms and legs

“I have never felt so complete as I feel with you,” Thorin moans softly against Dis’ neck again, nuzzling his nose into her hair which as always smells lovely and flowery. He meets her hips, sheathing himself as deep as he can into her soft wet channel, shivers running along his spinal cord. “My beloved,” he says too. His hands play with her hair for a moment as he presses his entire body against hers, enveloping her with his own warmth. Then he puts his palms down flat to raise himself up a little, get a little leverage to ride into her more vigorously. “Feels so nice. So perfect.”

She arches up into him, to meet him thrust by thrust, locking their gazes, holding on to his shoulders. “Yes. Oh yes.” She opens her legs even wider, to feel him even deeper in her very core, to have this perfect act burned into her memory forever. “More, my lover, give...give me... your all...come with me…” She gasps and pants, feeling her second, much more powerful climax start up inside of her. His shaft fitting so wonderfully into her body as though it is made for it.

He has never been so turned on by a woman before. Making love has never felt this pure, this intense, ever! Even though this is their first, and probably only, time together their bond is so strong that he feels completely at ease with his beloved sister. Her body feels as familiar to him as if she had been his lover for years.

He speeds up his thrusts, feeling Dis’ legs pull him in hard and deep now. Her molten core is making him leak in readiness for his climax. “Yes … sweetest … My love, so close …” he groans. Their hips slap together. Dis arches up against him again and he can see the deep flush run up her neck that signals she must be too.

So he lets go. One final thrust deep into that beautiful hot flower and the world ceases to exist beyond the two of them for just a moment. He feels the pulse of his climax extent to every part of his body as he releases inside his sweet sister and moans a muffled cry against her shoulder.

“Tho...Thorin!!” The moment she feels his warm seed spread into her, she feels herself flow on the wave of an extraordinary intense orgasm. It’s like her body and her soul reach it together with her beloved brother. She holds on as tight as she can as they ride their waves of pleasure together. She’s equally laughing and crying into his neck, completely overwhelmed by the pleasure and power of what they just shared together. She’s falling apart on his cock and under his gentle hands. 

Thorin lets himself drop forward onto his beloved sibling, seeking her lips again. He feels himself soften somewhat inside her warm core, but he tries to hold himself in place for as long as possible, never wanting this night that had been his perfect dream for so long to end. “I love you, Dizzy,” he murmurs against her swollen lips. “I wish I had more words to tell you just how much.”

“I love you, my prince." Dis treasure’s her brother’s weight on top of her, holding onto him, trying to also hold him inside of her as long as possible, seeing the pure love shine out of his eyes onto her. “Please let this night never end.”

He kisses her again as Dis gives voice to his thoughts. Reluctantly he rolls off her and pulls her into his arms. “No regrets then, my sweet princess?” he asks carefully.

“None at all.” She lies her head onto his chest, listening to his heart beat slowing down. After a moment she looks at him again, whispering, “I still can’t sleep. I want to stare at you like this forever, making sure that this is _not_ a dream.” She caresses his beard softly.

“Would you like to sleep here?” Thorin asks daringly, hoping he is not pushing things too far. “Just let the dream be real a bit longer?” he adds hopefully.

“Yes.” Dis smiles sadly and kisses his chest. “But what are we gonna do in the morning? Can we still live here together. I...”  _might be getting used to this._

“Of course, my sweet girl,” Thorin tilts her head and kisses her nose. “Nothing changes. It was … something we both wanted, both needed. Our special little secret.”  He pulls the duvet open and shuffles the two of them under it. “No-one needs to know,” he reminds her, cuddling her into his arms again.

Dis feels like set back in time, when they used to fall asleep like this. Her head tugged under his chin. His arms tight around her. One of her arms and legs possessively thrown across her big brother. Not knowing that life would take him from her. But tonight she had him back. Much more so than before. She still feels his wetness between her legs. She doesn’t want to think about tomorrow right now. “No one needs to know.” _That I love you like this._ She doesn’t say it out loud anymore because she has the feeling he’s already closing that door again. With her head on his warm chest she falls asleep anyway.

Thorin listens to Dis’ breathing slow and her body relax heavily against him in her sleep. He sighs softly. Tonight he had felt a happiness greater than he had ever felt before. Making love to his sweet sister had fulfilled all his dirtiest dreams, but there was so much more to it. _This is the woman I love. This is the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with and be happy with. And yet this is the only woman who can never be mine._

He strokes his hands softly through her curls, slightly damp from their exertion. “Sleep, my beloved,” he whispers into her hair. He fights his own exhaustion just a little longer, not wanting this night to be over, not wanting to face real life again in the morning, face up to what they have done. But eventually he too drifts off into a deep sleep, his arms protectively wrapped around the love of his life.

+++

The next morning Dis had got up before Thorin, before Fili, ensuring the toddler did not find her in his uncle’s room. And it seemed they had silently agreed between them to carry on with their lives as if nothing had happened. It appeared to be the best solution. Although there was obviously something there now that pulsed between them like electricity, it was just too complicated. Thorin was a busy man, Dis had her own job and Fili to look after. And above all it was something that just could not be between them, no matter how badly they both wanted it. So they just did not mention it again, simply silently savoured what they had shared but both trying not to long for something that should not be again.

Dis understands completely that their encounter had only been something like a one night stand, a one of. But now it hurts her more than before to be near her brother. She often catches herself when she’s about to kiss him on his beautiful mouth, to reluctantly only breathe a kiss against his cheek. And as the weeks progress she feels how she draws back from him more and more, arranging their schedules more around each other than with each other, just to avoid further temptation.

In any case she’s been plagued by terrible headaches and a never ending stomach virus, that left her feeling ill for days. Until after four weeks later she decides she has to visit the doctor and has left Fili in Thorin’s care as she does.

Thorin bounces Fili on his knees as they sing together. He had grown so close to his nephew over the last few months and that made it even harder to swallow that even though Dis and he acted normal he felt the awkward under current between them. Of course he knew that that would happen. One does not sleep with one’s sister and then carries on being normal big brother. Even so he has no regrets about what they had done. It had been so beautiful, so pure and so exciting!

Even though he would not proposition her, if she approached him again he knows that he would accept the invitation without hesitation. On so many occasions he had been close to asking if she would share his bed again.If she would even just kiss him. But each time he had managed to stop himself, believing that the way Dis was distancing herself she had her doubts about what had passed between them and not wanting to risk being turned down.

So instead he concentrated on looking after Fili, giving him a warm and secure home to grow up in.

He laughs as Fili throws random words into the song and soon they are both in fits of laughter when the front door opens again.

“Mummy!!!” Fili jumps off his lap in an instant and runs towards his mother, wrapping his little arms around her legs.

Thorin looks up with a smile, but he also has a concern churning in his stomach. Dis had looked pale these last few weeks. And she did not seem able to shake this bug that had struck her. “How did it go?” he asks, getting up himself.

“You’d better stay seated.” She takes up her little one and cuddles him close, sitting down herself. “Would you… could you please make us tea? I … I can’t…”

Thorin can feel his heart go ten to the dozen. _Oh my god. It’s cancer. It is something awful. She’s going to die._ Sheer panic overwhelms him and he feels his hands shaking. “Of course,” he manages to utter, understanding that with Fili in the room they cannot discuss something like that openly. He switches on the kettle but the whole kitchen feels like it is spinning around him and when he finally returns with the hot drinks he can barely hold his hands still enough not to spill it everywhere. “Fee, why don’t you go and play in your room for a moment,” he forces a smile onto his face, watching the toddler jump up. “And then when mummy and I are done talking we can make cookies.”

 “Yay!” Fili squeals and he is off already.

“What did he say?!” Thorin falls onto the sofa next to his sister and takes her hands in his. “Please tell me. Is it bad? What is it?”

“It depends how one sees it,” Dis says cryptically, looking at her brother earnestly, kind of relieved to see all the worry in his eyes, in his whole posture. “It could be worse, I guess.”

“Could be worse? So … it’s not cancer?” Thorin asks, frustration in his voice now. “Please just tell me, princess.” He suddenly realises the last time he had used that nickname was when they made love together, but right now his head is so full of worry that he barely registers her surprised look.

Since Fili truly seems to be playing with his toys in his room, Dis allows herself to lay her hand against Thorin’s cheek. “No silly! Not cancer!” She’s very tempted to kiss her brother now that he had used that nickname again, but still isn’t sure if she should. “I’m... _You’regoingtobeafather,”_ She rushes it all out in one long word, not knowing if she should be happy or sad about the fact.

Thorin stares at her for a moment. He is sure he must have heard it wrong. _You are going to be a father_ ,he unpicks the jumble of words. His mouth drops open as his eyes grow wide. “You … But … You said … You were on the pill!” he stutters, letting go off her hands now to cover his mouth in shock.

“I am… I was. Apparently there is a minor percentage where the damn things don’t work…” She takes her tea from the table and sips it slowly to soothe both her aching stomach and her nerves. _What have we done? Created life we do not want? We? I need to get information how bad it is to have a child with your sibling. But I DO WANT it._

“I am going to be a father …” Thorin whispers the words out loud this time. He raises his eyes to Dis again and takes her hands once more. “This is real?” he checks, needing to be very sure. “You are pregnant? With .. with _my_ child?”

“Now that is more the reaction I hoped for,” she whispers, a big lump in her throat. “I first went to a normal doctor and said I have a stomach virus.” She shuffles closer to Thorin. “He said no, you better check with the gynecologist. So I did…She did the ultrasound with me and yes, I’m pregnant.” She squeezes his hands back and looks him into his beautiful eyes as she almost chokes with emotion. “With _our_ child.”

“I am going to be a father!” This time Thorin says the words with an excited bounce in his voice as he beams at Dis. “Oh Dizzy, but that is wonderful news!” Suddenly his face drops. “You are keeping it aren’t you?” he asks, feeling his heartbeat race again. “Please, I want to keep it. If … if you do. _Our_ child!” He knows it is her body, he should accept her choice. But he already knows he would be utterly devastated if she decided not to keep the little life that they had created in this moment of forbidden passion.

“Oh my God, you want to keep it? You’re happy?” Dis sobs in relief. “Even though it might be...we have to...to do research. But _yes_ I want to keep it.” She nods, tears running down her cheeks. _Please kiss me, please._

“Happy? Of course I am happy!” Thorin grins from ear to ear. “I am shocked. I am shit scared! But … Oh my God, Dizzy. We're going to be a family! I am going to take care of you. You and Fili and our unborn baby.” He cups her face, “I love you so.” And then presses their lips together gently, for the first time since that night that brought them this wonderful new life.

“Oh Thorin.” She kisses him gently back, but then she hears little feet running along the hallway and swiftly turns the kiss into a fierce hug. “I love you too.” She whispers into his ear. “Thank you for giving us this wonderful gift.” She cries a little into his hair, so many emotions whirling inside of her. “Do you think it’s going to be healthy?” Dis asks her biggest concern first.

But Thorin kisses the back of her hand and smiles, “A child made out of such strong love? Yes,” he nods, placing his hand carefully on her tummy, “he or she will be absolutely perfect.”

Dis smiles through her tears at his reassuring words and is only able to nod when Fili squirms between them, “Why are you crying, mummy?” He climbs onto Thorin’s lap. “Uncle Thorin, why are you crying too?”

“It’s okay, little Fee. Mummy and I are crying because we are very happy,” Thorin smiles, placing a kiss on his blond curls. “I know, silly adults, right? Now … shall we go and make those cookies?”  

Little Fili nods enthusiastically and disappears into the kitchen where he starts to rummage in the lower parts of the kitchen cupboards.

“Thorin,” Dis whispers softly and takes him by the hand. “Where exactly does that leave us now?” She says very close to his lips, willing him silently to understand her meaning.

"I don't know," Thorin whispers back, brushing her cheek. "All I know is that I want to be with you. That I want the four of us to be a little family. And that I want to make you happy." He kisses her ever so softly. "What do you want, my love?"

She hugs him close, melting her whole body against his, so very happy about his words, all her feelings of illness seem to disappear at once. “Yes, I want that too.” She kisses his jawline. “We are brother and sister when Fee is around and if he isn’t…” She’s pressing her breasts deliberately firm against his chest.

"Maybe he's young enough for us to change that thought in his head. That uncle Thorin really is just daddy?" Thorin says hopefully. "We could move away. Pretend we are just a normal family? Our little secret. We'll work it out, somehow. All I know is that I let you slip away from me once and I will not let it happen again."

“Oh my God, really? You really mean that?” Dis starts to flutter tiny butterfly kisses all across his face. “Oh Thorin you make me so happy already!” She starts to cry anew but this time it’s tears of joy. “You’d quit your job for us, leave your friends and just move away?”

"It won't be easy but..."  

"Uncle Thorin!" Fili whines from the entrance to the kitchen as he's still talking to his mother rather than making the promised cookies.

Thorin laughs and gets up. "Coming!" he calls. He bends low and kisses Dis' forehead. "I will do anything for you,” he restates what he has already promised her in bed. “I've lost so many years that I need to make up for and I am starting now."

She suddenly laughs, “By making cookies? That’s very nice of you… _daddy._ ” She smiles warmly at her son and her brother, relaxing back in her seat for the first time in what seems _years.”_

 _"_ Yes, by making cookies," Thorin grins, lifting Fili high up in the air and then holding him in his arms. "What do you say little man, would you like uncle Thorin to be your daddy?" He can hear his sister gasp but Fili just throws his little arms around his neck, shouting "Yeah! Now we go make cookies!"  

"That's settled then," Thorin winks at his sister.

Dis smiles back with all the love she’s feeling right now, following them both into the kitchen. She strokes affectionately across her belly as she watches both her tiny son and her brother _and beloved_ start to mess up the whole counter with flour, sugar, eggs and chocolate, already picturing life as a little family of four with her beloved brother. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Author's tag - sex during pregnancy

"Thorin?" Dis closes the door of her brother's room silently behind her, having a little deja vu feeling from a few weeks ago. This time she's a lot happier than back then though. "Our little baker finally fell asleep." She smiles at her brother when he looks up at her from his paperwork with a bright smile.

“You look beautiful.” He had tried so hard not to say that since they slept together and now it feels like a complete relief to be able to without fear of causing just more confusion between them. He turns around fully on his chair and waits for her to step between his legs, wrapping his arms around her waist.

“I’ve missed you these past few weeks,” she says softly, caressing his few loose strands of hair out of his face. “I think my bug was nerves too. It’s gone all of a sudden.” Dis hesitantly bends forward a little, the intimacy still unfamiliar, hovering with her mouth close to his.

Thorin stretches himself upright to close the kiss softly, lips just brushing. “I was not sure if you had regretted it after all. That you thought it was just too complicated … or wrong,” he adds quietly.

“Oh my God, no! None of that. I thought _you_ thought that.” Dis repeats the kiss just as tenderly, getting butterflies in her stomach at the action, _knowing_ they just gave each other permission that this is not a one off between them anymore now.

“Well, looks like we need to talk more,” Thorin chuckles softly. He looks at Dis’ tummy and reverently places his hands there. “I still cannot believe it,” he smiles, leaning forward to place a soft kiss there also.

“You’d better believe it, _daddy,”_ she says playfully and strokes her fingers through his hair, loosening his pony tail. “Promise me we’ll talk a lot more, not live on assumptions, please

“I promise,” Thorin smiles up at his sister. “Are you truly happy? I am very sorry that this little accident happened, but I am also over the moon that it has.”

“So we call _it_ our little accident until we know what it is?” She smiles too and lifts his head  up with her finger under his chin. “You ask me if I’m happy?” Dis kisses him softly. “I love you, Thorin Oakenshield. I have never been more happy in my whole life.” She takes his face gently into her hands, brushing their noses together. “And I’m just as convinced as you that our little accident is going to be healthy.”

“Yes, it will be,” Thorin promises. “But we will love our little accident no matter what.” He caresses her tummy again, completely in awe that _his_ child is growing in there now. “And I love you, my beautiful princess. More than anything in this world. Thank you for this beautiful gift you are carrying for me.”

Dis hugs her brother’s head gently against her stomach, sighing deeply. “Thank you for accepting it so freely, for being so very happy about it, my beloved.” She can’t stop herself from stroking through his hair again and again; a thing she had wanted to do all her life. “The whole way back from the doctor I was so afraid you wouldn’t want it... That _I_  wouldn’t want it…”

“How could I not want this?” Thorin raises an eyebrow. “My love, this child is something that we created during the best night of my life.” He pulls her lips against his again. “And it is going to be so loved. You and Fili are already making me the happiest man alive and this little miracle will just make my life complete.” He hugs her carefully against him, just breathing in her scent.

She starts to cry, emotions totally overwhelming her. “Yes, it was created in the most wonderful night of my life as well, my beloved brother.” Dis softly sneaks her tongue into his mouth. “It was like I was still a virgin and you took my virginity and now I’m carrying that beautiful gift of our love.” She steps away a little and takes his hand. “Can we lie down please? I’m feeling weak in my knees,” she laughs through her tears.

Thorin lets her lead him towards his bed. “Is there anything I can get you?” he asks a little concerned as she lies down. “Anything I can do for you?” He brushes her face softly, lovingly.

“I would like some water, please. And you, only you. I’ve waited way too long.” She pats the bed beside her, her eyes now openly showing her admiration, her different love for her brother.

“I will be right back,” Thorin rushes towards the bathroom, coming back immediately with a glass of water. He sits down next to his sister and just looks at her with more love than he is sure he can even contain. “How have we managed to ignore these feelings we have for so long?” he wonders out loud.

She empties the glass and puts it on the night stand. “We’ve let our minds rule our hearts, listening to prejudice, to what people say is wrong…” Dis lovingly slides her fingertips over his bare forearm, loving the dark hairs there. “Come lie down with me.” Thorin lies himself next to her and softly strokes her face, her hair, just enjoying looking at his beautiful sister, his love, without worries about what is right or wrong.

Dis turns on her side to face her brother, actually _looking_ at him. Not only stealing glances. She traces the lines in the corners of his eyes with her fingertips. “You’re beautiful, big brother.” She bends forward and gently puts her lips against his eyelids, savouring the feeling of being allowed to do this.

“This cannot be wrong,” Thorin whispers softly against those lovely lips. “Something that feels so good, so pure between two consenting adults …” He strokes her soft curls again. “Will you sleep in my arms tonight, my princess?” he asks hopefully.

"Yes, my prince." Dis snuggles even closer to the warm body of her man. "And every other night there will be in our lives." She showers his cheeks, nose and beard with tiny kisses. "I love you so much." Her hands holding on tight to his large ones. “I can’t believe we can do this now whenever we feel like it.” She kisses him deeply.

"Well, whenever we are in the house,” Thorin reminds her sadly. “But that is okay.” He brushes her hair behind her ear again and kisses her nose. “That is more than I had dared dream of before.”

+++

Thorin had never thought of himself as a family man. He was practically married to his work and before Dis had Fili he had had very little to do with children and had practically sworn that he would never have any. Now he wonders if those feelings and statements were simply because he didn't think he would ever have the family he truly wanted in his heart, for he is surprised by just how overwhelmingly strong his fatherly feelings for his nephew and his unborn child already are and how easily he finds the role fit him.

He smiles up when his sister enters the kitchen in her dressing gown, hair a wild mess of curls, sleep still softening her features. He'd got Fili up, wanting his exhausted sister to get a few more moments of sleep and the toddler is already sat at the table prodding his spoon into his cereal.

"Morning," he smiles at her fondly. "Did you sleep okay?"

“Morning, my princes.” Dis kisses both on their cheeks, happy at the completely changed breakfast atmosphere. No sidestepping each other, no stolen glances, but deep warmth spreading from the man she loves, and who loves her. “I slept like a log.” She takes a careful bite of toast, letting her hand travel down his back. “Waking up wasn’t that enjoyable though.” She circles her belly carefully. “I had to visit the bathroom quickly. Do we have some chamomile tea left?”

"I'm sorry, Dizzy, for making you feel unwell. Just sit down and I'll make you some tea," he says softly kissing her cheek.

“You are not the one who makes me feel unwell.” She smiles up at him, Fili repeating the word _unwell_ as he knocks on his table with his spoon.

Thorin brews his sister the tea and sits himself at the table too, already dressed in his suit ready to go to work. "Fili, eat your breakfast," he says sternly. "Or we'll be late." He smiles at Dis, "I can drop him off at playgroup today. You can just take it easy this morning."

“Thank you.” Without thinking she kisses her brother on his mouth even in front of little Fee. “I might just call in sick and get my strength back. You are the best.”

Fili pulls a face. "Yuck!" But Thorin can see it is simply a little boy disapproving of two kissing adults, not because his uncle is kissing his mother and he smiles. "You'd best eat that up quick or we'll kiss you too," he threatens, grinning.

"Nooooo!" Fili squeals already wiping his little arms across his face in disgust and he quickly dips his spoon into his breakfast bowl again.

Dis smiles fondly after them when she waves them goodbye at the door. She can’t believe her luck. Thorin really wanting the baby, wanting her and Fili be a real family. It’s like after hell she’s finally come into heaven. She strokes across her belly, “He’ll be the best daddy, ever, sweet baby.” She’s relieved that she now can allow herself to love the child that’s growing inside of her.

She closes the front door and slowly walks into Thorin’s room, cuddles herself into his duvet, burying her nose into his pillow, inhaling his scent, sighing, “I love you so much.” And falls asleep.

+++

“Are you coming with me?” Dis asks, wanting her brother so badly with her when she’s going to get to know if everything is okay so far with their baby.

"Are you kidding me?" Thorin grins from ear to ear. "Of course I am! You'd have to lock me up not to!" He knows he should not be quite so excited just yet. Over the last few weeks they'd done a lot of research into their situation and they know the risk that anything is not quite right with their baby is higher than normal. But he just cannot help himself as he cuddles his sister close. He'd doted on her and Fili every moment he was home and he'd even cut down his normal burnout schedule. Now that he had something so wonderful to come home to for the first time in his life work took a backseat.

“Well, I wasn’t sure if someone becomes suspicious...but no one knows us there since this is the opposite part of the city.” She tiptoes and kisses him gently on the lips, “Let’s go then, daddy.”

Thorin feels happy flutters tickle his insides at the honourable title. "Ready, mummy," he gleams back, grabbing his car keys.

+++

Dis holds Thorin’s hand tightly in hers as the doctor applies the cold liquid on her still normal sized tummy. She stares at the screen, willing the baby to be okay, biting her tongue, to not ask too many obvious questions. _We are normal parents!_

Thorin realises he's actually holding his breath as he watches the grainy screen. He'd felt so sure that their little miracle was going to be okay but now that the moment of truth is here his nerves are getting the better of him. _I will love it no matter what,_ he keeps repeating to himself like a mantra as he gently squeezes Dis' hand when the sonographer points out the baby's head.

The doctor smiles with understanding at both of them. “Everything is normal for the fourteenth week. The little heart is beating correctly.”

 _Thank God!_ Thorin squeezes Dis' hand again, feeling himself relax just a little bit as the lady continues to check their child, counting four limbs and everything else in all the right places. "So it's okay?" he just has to ask, unable to hold his tongue any longer.

The doctor smiles at them, surprised at the anxiety she hears in his voice. But all parents are anxious all the time especially so early in the pregnancy. "Is there any genetic failure in your families that causes you concerns?" she asks nonetheless.

"No!" Dis says way too loudly to her ears. "It's just...when I browsed the internet I read so much scary stuff." She listens to that regular heartbeat they hear over the speakers very fondly, staring at the screen.

Thorin strokes her hand soothingly. "No," he says also, more calmly. "But we're older parents. And this is my first. I'm just glad all seems okay," he puts on a soft smile to cover his own now rapidly beating heart.

"All is as it should be at this moment in time," the doctor reassures them both. "You have the option now to take the test for Downs which is of course a higher risk at your age."

Thorin looks at his sister and shakes his head. They'd talked about that and had agreed that even if that was positive they would keep the child so there was no point in risking their little miracle for something that would not change their minds. "Thank you, doctor." He just has to lean forward and kiss his sister's forehead. But then they are supposed to be normal parents so it surely is okay.

Dis sighs, super-relieved, and gets up to put her clothes back on. She can’t wait for the moment to wrap her arms around her brother fiercely. “Thank you so much.” She says, voice shaking with emotion.

“The next time we might be able to see if you will have a daughter or a son.” The doctor shakes their hands for good bye.

+++

“It’s okay!!!” Dis wraps her arms around Thorin in the empty hallway not able to wait any longer. “Our little miracle has everything it needs.” She showers his face with tiny kisses, out of her mind with joyful emotion. “Oh Thorin I’m so very happy!” She whispers softly.

"My beautiful, precious girl. We're going to be parents together. We're going to have a baby! This is really happening!" He lifts his baby sister up in the air as he is used to doing but then quickly puts her back on her feet. "I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

Dis giggles, loving the gesture. “Why should I not be? I love to see you like this!” She quickly kisses him on the mouth. “Let’s go home.” She checks her watch. “We’ve got three hours until we’ll have to get Fee.” She winks at him playfully.

Thorin raises a questioning eyebrow. _Surely she does not suggest..._

But as soon as they close the front door behind them Dis leaves no room for interpretation when she grabs his hand and leads him up the stairs to her bedroom.

"Princess, are you sure about this? I... I am scared to hurt you or the baby," he says softly as she showers his neck in needy kisses.

“Honey, you saw the baby. It’s tiny still. How would you hurt it?” She pushes her brother playfully towards the bed. “And yes, I am sure, big brother. I want you.” Dis grins like a predator, opening his shirt buttons with agile fingers.

Thorin still feels a little hesitant. Yes, the baby is tiny still but it is growing, inside her! But since his sister clearly has her mind set on this he leans back and smiles. “I like that,” he says happily. “You wanting me. You look so very gorgeous.”

“Thank you, and so are you.” When he lies fully on his back she climbs on top of him, straddling his hips. “That’s why I want you so bad.” She’s opened all the shirt buttons by now and slides the thin material apart, revealing Thorin’s beautiful chest and stomach. She lets her fingers slide through the coarse, dark hair, sprinkled with silver. “Perfect.” She kneads his strong muscles, smiling down at him. “You have been so calm at the doctor’s, you’re my hero.”

“Calm?” Thorin actually laughs out loud at that. “I was so nervous,” he admits. “And when she said everything looked okay … I could have kissed that woman and all!” He pulls his sister down to kiss her sweet soft lips in that very gesture. “My beautiful carrier of our little present.” He slowly runs his large hands down her back, cupping her backside. “My lovely girl … You really think we can repeat that perfect moment?”

“Of course we can.” She whispers against his lips, licking her tongue across them, loving the slight scratch of his beard. “Every second I’m together with you like this is a perfect moment.” She gently strokes through his hair, rocking herself ever so slightly against his groin, feeling him grow beneath her despite his concerns. 

He pulls those lips against his again, massaging them softly at first and then pushes his tongue against her mouth, gently encouraging her to let him in. He repeats her motion of stroking her beautiful ebony locks. He loves the feeling of her tongue sliding against his own, playing, exploring. So good to finally do this! He feels his erection grow in earnest now, especially as she rubs herself against him like a cat. And he moans softly into her mouth.

Dis can’t get enough of kissing her brother like this. Deep and slow. His tongue as tender as his hands on her back. She opens her mouth as wide as she can to let him inside, have all of her. Her panties getting wet from her arousal.

After a few long moments of devouring each other she has to break the kiss for air. “Undress me, my prince. Please.”

Thorin rolls his sister onto her back, wanting to look at her as he obeys her request. He cannot stop smiling as he slides his hands under her shirt, feeling her warm skin underneath as he moves the garment over her head. He admires her breasts inside her lace bra for a moment, just letting his fingers trace their outline. “These are gorgeous,” he says cheekily. He leans down and kisses her through the lingerie.

She arches her back to get her breasts closer to his mouth, clawing at his shoulders, trying to get his shirt off him, loving how his hair cascades all around her, tickling her nude skin. She starts to fumble with his belt with one hand and rubbing his hard on with the other. “Hmmm Thorin, I’m so happy I finally feel like doing this again.”

“I wasn’t sure if you wanted to… Or that we could even!” Thorin admits. He licks a stripe in the dip between her perfect breasts down to the lace and then slides his hands underneath her back to fumble with the clasp. “Damn these things,” he grumbles for a moment as his large fingers struggle with the tiny clasps.

“I didn’t feel like doing anything at all at first, with feeling sick all the time.” Dis reaches behindher and helps him. “But since a few days...I want to jump you.” She captures his mouth again.

“Jump me?” Thorin grins wickedly. He moves the fine lingerie out of the way, dropping it on the floor, and nuzzles his nose between her lovely soft mounds again, already somewhat fuller as her body is beginning to change to accommodate their child. His hands stroke the sides, so warm and soft under his fingers as he presses little kisses in-between. “I cannot get enough of your lovely breasts,” he utters, finding everything so enormously arousing about his beautiful sister. “They are just perfect.”

“You make me blush, brother.” Dis loves to use _brother_ as endearment now. She has no idea why, it’s just so special, what they have between them. “Keep on doing that. I love your hands and mouth on me.” She sighs and feels her nipples get hard, even though he hasn’t touched her there yet. Her hands have finally opened the belt and now she slides his zipper down ever so slowly.

“Oh lovely Dizzy, that’s … amazing. To feel your hands on me like that. They are so soft …” He slides his own carefully over her breasts now, kneading them softly in his hands. He loves how she wriggles softly under his touches, arching up into the palms of his hands. He begins to trace the outline of her nipples, where the skin is even softer and so much darker. “Do you like that, princess? Does it feel nice?” he whispers.

“Ngghh, lick them please, touch them my beloved.” She arches even more towards him, feeling the heat rise between them, wanting to hold on to him but at the same time get his jeans off him.

Thorin helps wriggle himself out of his trousers first, just grinding his clothed cock into his sister’s waiting hand, liking to play for just a moment longer before he reveals all. He grins at her, keeping his eyes trained on hers as he bends down and slowly licks the same circle that his fingers had. And as she groans and arches again he takes one of those pink buds into the heat of his mouth, sucking softly at it, letting his tongue slide across the tip.

“YESSS!! Oh Thorin, yessss...that’s ...hmmm...” There is almost no better feeling as having her nipple caressed like that. “So gooood..” She tries to give her brother the same pleasure with gently sliding the tip of her finger across that wet spot on his underwear.

“Mmm, yes good …” Thorin moans softly under her touch. He moves to her other erect peak, licking his rough tongue around the sensitive bud whilst his fingers still play with the other. He is amazed how in forty years he never knew that his sister loved this - but then why would a brother normally! He feels like he wants to map out every spot on her body that gives her pleasure; to learn where and how she wants to be touched by him. “Touch me …” He pulls down his trunks, freeing his private parts so that her fingers can touch him all over. “I love you touching my cock …”

"And I love playing with it." She smirks, feeling really naughty. Dis never before felt the urge to do this with her husband, but with Thorin she does. He is so very caring. She wants to give that back. "It feels so smooth." Her fingers explore the strained flesh, circling the crown, loving the pleasurable hiss that motion extracts from her brother.

“You have such a nice touch,” Thorin mutters softly against the curves of her chest. “And you feel so soft and warm.” He lets his hand trail down, across her stomach - which now has him worship her even more - and down the curve of her hips where he slowly pulls up her skirt, stroking up her thigh towards that ever increasing heat between her legs.

“Hm, yeah, touch me there, feel how wet I am for you.” She spreads her legs wider, never thought she’d be one for dirty talk, but somehow he inspires it. Her hand explores him further, stroking his balls gently. Not able to decide if she should look down and see what their hands are doing, or look up into his beautiful eyes that shine with so much love for her.

Thorin feels his breath hitch at his sister’s words and keenness. He slides his hand between her legs at her invitation and feels the wetness through her panties. “Oh, Dizzy …” He rolls himself a little onto his side and nuzzles her neck as he lets his fingers slip behind the material. His cock throbs pleasantly as he strokes her soft parts, so very wet for him already. “You make me so hard, my love,” he groans softly.

“Hmm keep doing that.” She moans and pulls his head down to devour him while she feels herself swell under his fingers and thumb. The fact that he didn’t even remove her underwear yet makes it even more erotic. She fists his cock now even more firmly, loving the eager twitch she gets from that and she gently lets her fingertip slide across Thorin’s nipple, wondering if he’s just as sensitive as she is there.

“Mmm, nice,” Thorin brushes his lips against hers again. No-one had ever touched him so gently, so tenderly and yet so arousing before. Or maybe it had just never meant so very much. But these forbidden and yet so perfect, wonderful touches are sending sparks of electricity to his brain and his prick all at once. He carefully pushes his fingers into her heat, moving them around slowly at first and then prodding her a little more firmly when his sister responds eagerly. She is so hot inside, so wonderfully wet and soft. And already he can barely wait to replace his fingers with his needy cock.

Having his fingers inside of her makes her buck against him, yearning for more, for deeper. It’s like he’s caressing all her nerve endings, with his lips on her nipple, his fingers spoiling her inside. She tries to wriggle out of her panties.

Thorin gets the hint and pulls back his fingers, allowing her to remove her under garment. He coats the tip of his prick in her warm juices, which sends a shiver through him. “Want to make love to you,” he smiles softly at her, already making to move himself on top of his beloved sibling, but Dis stops him.

He is momentarily confused. “I’m sorry, I thought you wanted to …” he says softly, feeling a little embarrassed that he seemed to have misread her.

But she smiles up at him and pecks him on his lips, then rolls him on his back. “I want to spoil you today my gorgeous man.” Dis removes her skirt, even though she had planned to do it with the piece still on. But it is much better to have no material whatsoever between them, then she slowly straddles him, holding his throbbing manhood in her hand and with a wicked grin she leans down to flick her tongue across that tempting slit, which is glistening so invitingly, with his and her juices combined.

“Oh my, Dizzy!” Thorin grins back at her, feeling his cheeks flush with arousal. “My god, you are so sexy.” With a happy smile he rests his head back and lets her have her way with him, loving every bit of her spoils already.

She lets her hands slide across his torso, his arms, his stomach, followed by her tongue. “I want to eat you up my super sexy brother.” When she’s at his cock head, she takes it into her mouth and sucks ever so gently. But then she moves herself up again and positions his love sword right against her dripping entrance, caressing her clit with it briefly which sends shudders through her whole body and then letting herself slide down onto it half way, moaning with pleasure at the feeling of having him inside again after so many weeks.

“Oh my god …” Thorin groans breathlessly. He looks at his sister’s flushed face, at the look of pleasure and lust painted there. The wet heat that slides down his hard member is simply overwhelming. The first time they had slept together had been so nerve-wracking; knowing how much was at stake, thinking at the time it would be a one off. But now that things had changed so dramatically, this time he feels he can really let go, really enjoy everything they share so intimately.

He places his hands on her thighs as she lowers herself further down, kneading her soft flesh. “Oh my sweet, sweet sister, you are too good to me,” he groans in pleasure.

“You...god, you feel so wonderful…thick...” She lies her hands onto his, spreading her legs more, sliding even further down on his scorching hard on. He throbs inside her and she feels her inner muscles flutter to welcome him in. Dis leans forward now to kiss her beloved brother again, keeping him inside, moving slightly back and forth, her tongue licking his lips.

Thorin digs his hands into her hair, pulling her lips hard against his. “Ride me, my love,” he whispers against her lips, bucking his own hips up to meet hers. His cock feels so perfectly taken care of by her warm wet flower and he just wants to stay here forever like this, making love with his beautiful sibling.

“Yes!” Dis starts to do just that, ride him. First slowly, explorative. How far can she go? Does it hurt? But it doesn’t. It feels awesome. _He_ feels awesome inside of her, against her when she bottoms out and groans loudly. She squeezes her muscles to stimulate herself and him even more. The slide makes her all tingly and sweaty and she moves faster, moaning loudly, staring down at his blissful expression.

“Yes! Oh my sexy princess!” Thorin beams back at her, loving to see his normally so sweet and timid sister let go of all her self-imposed restraints and take pleasure from him. “That’s ...amazing.” He returns his hands to her hips again, helping her rock faster and then slides them under her buttocks so that he can lift her up a little, allowing even more friction. “Is that … okay? I’m not hurting you, am I?” he asks carefully as he pounds up a little harder.

“Sweet Jesus!” She throws her head back and wants this never to stop. _He’s so very hard for me. So delicious!_ “Thorin!” She doesn’t know if it’s safe to ask for more but it is so very good! She screws herself down on him and then lifts herself up again so he can pound into her at just the right angle. “That’s so g...good!” She takes his one hand and lays it onto her breast, wanting to feel him there too. 

At first her outcry had shocked him, but he can see that it is all just sheer pleasure that is wracking her beautiful body. He kneads her breasts in his hands, tweaking her nipples just gently, making her wail lustfully. “Baby … I’m so close …” he moans as she shafts herself onto him again, all dripping heat gripping him so wonderfully.

“Come for me brother,” she gasps, staring into his eyes, now dark with so much lust, strands of hair falling into her face. She’s never let go so completely, never was so much out of control. “Oh God, I love you. Inside of me. So hot. SO HARD! Give me your love liquid…” So many words, but they all want out with each trust. She has withheld them for so long. “I love you, _Thorin!!_ ” She sobs as she falls forward to support herself on her hands, feeling her climax approach.

“Love you … too.” It is the last bit of English Thorin is just able to string together before his brain turns to mush when he blooms inside of her. He grabs hold of her waist, pulling her hard against him, needing to be so deep inside that delicious warm cave as he comes for her, with her, grunting and moaning, swimming in that wave of ultimate pleasure, sweat pooling between them.

The most fantastic orgasm is hitting her just then, when she feels her brother’s seed erupt inside of her. When she feels him shudder violently against her, his arms securely around her body. Her pleasure muscles are contracting, everything is super sensitive and high and she’s spoiled to her very core. The sounds that escape her mingle with her brother’s guttural ones, shuddering and shaking and just falling completely apart.

It takes a long few minutes before both their breathing and heart rates settle enough for the two siblings to speak again. “That was incredible,” Thorin pants, pulling his sister into his embrace, all hot and sweaty and deliciously filthy from their joining. “I am so very crazily in love with you, my lovely Dizzy.”

“I’m madly in love with you, my beloved Thorin.” She smiles at him, totally exhausted and satisfied. “We have a lot of catching up to do.” Dis brushes her lips against his beard, tracing his face with her finger. She can’t stop looking at his normally so composed features all sweaty and gleaming with utter joy and happiness. 

“We do,” Thorin agrees, drinking in their sweet and heavy scent of sex, like some exotic flower. “And you are definitely okay? I did not hurt you or the baby?” he asks again, stroking her back softly.

“Nothing hurts, _daddy_.” Dis kisses him softly. “I’ve never felt better. I swear.” She smiles, “And you? I kind of overwhelmed you.” She giggles a little.

Thorin chuckles too. “You did, you sexy thing. I feel .. wonderful. In love. Happy. Like I’ve had the best sex ever!” He kisses her again and then just cuddles her up in his arms for a moment until they have to get up, shower and pick up Fili. “Life just feels perfect. I know it isn’t, I know there are so many complications ahead of us. But right now, lying here with you, with our little miracle all snuggled up inside you … I could not be happier.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter tags - heavily pregnant oral sex.

Dis leans back against her brother's chest, sighing, feeling his loving arms around her large belly. "I'm so happy they could finally tell us for sure it's a boy." She looks gently down, caressing the baby inside of her.

Thorin kisses her shoulder softly, wrapping his hand over hers. “Our beautiful miracle.” Another gentle kiss on her skin. “So will we tell Fili now he is going to have a little brother?” he asks.

"Yes, of course." She turns her head and smiles kissing Thorin's bearded jaw. "Are we going to call him Kilian, as planned?" she snuggles into his embrace.

“Yes, Kilian,” Thorin smiles. “I would like that a lot. A strong name for our little warrior,” he grins, rubbing her taut skin gently.

"Warrior?!" She looks at Thorin questioningly. "I thought more about Fili and Kili from The Hobbit book." She turns her brother's head towards her with her fingertips.

“Well, they were warriors,” Thorin laughs. “And princes if I recall correctly. Which suits very well as the sons of my beautiful princess.”

"Alright!" She laughs. "And you are my king anyway." Dis searches for his mouth with hers, stroking across his lips with the tip of her tongue.

Thorin smiles under her soft play. “You are even more beautiful now, you know,” he whispers against her lips. “All swollen with our child. You really look stunning, _mummy_.”

"Thank you." She blushes at the compliment. "And I love it when you look so very happy." She repeats the movement with her tongue, feeling so very comfortable on _their_ new sofa in _their_ new home. "Play with me, my king." She breathes against his lips, takes his hand from her belly and lays it onto her breast.

"Really?" Thorin asks with a little glint in his eyes.

The last few months had been stressful for the both of them. The worry over the health of their unborn child, even though all the scans and tests so far had been good. Then there was the move to another country; stressful in any situation but theirs so much worse. They'd talked a lot about this. Between them. With Fili. Even with some friends, obviously without telling the true reason why. Thorin had said he'd had an offer of a job there and it was an opportunity for Dis to start a new life. They maintained that the child in her belly was her estranged husband's but that he'd rejected it as his. It was an unpleasant lie but the best they'd been able to uphold.

Fortunately Fili only saw the excitement in everything. Sure he missed his friends in England but he'd already made new ones here. And he was just bubbling over with glee over his big adventure abroad, his new -and much bigger!- bedroom that he was able to decorate with spaceships and monsters. And of course the baby! When they'd told him that mummy was going to have a little brother or sister for him to play with soon he had bounced up and down for a whole afternoon solid, telling them all the things he was going to show and teach his new sibling. And as mummy's tummy grew so had his eyes. And every morning he crawled into the bed they now shared and kissed mummy's tummy telling the baby it was time to wake up.

But in between all that and on top of Dis' growing discomfort there had been little opportunity for intimacy.

"You'd like us to do ... nice things?" he asks in total surprise.

“Yes please.” She whispers into his ear, guiding his other hand a little lower. “If I’d be a guy, I’d say I’m horny for you, big brother.” Dis continues placing tiny kisses against his neck.

The move had been really exhausting in her state but Thorin had done everything to make it easy for her and little Fee. And being greeted as a true family by the new, friendly neighbours has really been worth it already. Dis feels like she now can finally relax and enjoy the last months with _their_ baby inside her. It hurt so much to tell to people that she is pregnant from her ex since Kilian is a child of so much love. Their little miracle. But they promised each other they’ll love their little Fili just as much, as _theirs_ too.

"Oh!" Thorin grins. "That's a lovely surprise!" He kisses her neck and whispers in her ear, "I'm horny for you too, my beautiful _wife_." He had loved being able to introduce her as that to their new neighbours, to start their lives again and not worry about the truth. Unofficially they were just a normal family expecting their second child. But at least officially here there were no laws against their relationship that would see either of them in prison. Still, they would not shout it from the rooftops. Even if the law allowed them to be together, that did not mean that society approved of brother and sister being in love and having a baby. This would always be their little secret.

He trails his hand down her even curvier frame now, stroking the top of her thigh with his one hand as the other gently moulds her voluptuous and sensitive breasts.

“Hmm, _husband…”_ She sighs again, sinking against him even more. “I love your hands on me…” Suddenly she feels a bump from inside and starts to giggle. She places Thorin’s hand onto her belly again. “Feel it? Looks like someone has something against naughty games.”

Thorin chuckles as he feels the little kick against the palm of his hand. “Sssh, little one,” he whispers against her belly. “Mummy and daddy are going to have some play time. You will get your turn for our attention soon enough.” He moves himself back up to seek his sister’s lips, pulling her gently against him, his groin against her back, kissing her long and soft. “I want to make you feel all relaxed,” he says softly, stroking her bosom again.

“I want to return the favour though.” Dis looks at him, still giggling. “I have no idea how we are going to do that.” She licks playfully at his ear lobe, wriggling a little, feeling her brother harden against her backside.

“I have some ideas,” Thorin grins as he carefully wriggles himself out of their embrace. He walks barefoot over to the door and locks it. Fili had been put to bed over an hour ago, but occasionally he got up, having a nightmare or wanting some water, and this was not something he wanted his stepson to walk in on. As he turns around he just looks at his lovely sister for a moment, letting his eyes glide over her wonderful body, so heavy with pregnancy now, the perfect vessel for his son to grow in.“You are such a miracle,” he beams as he walks back over to her.

“Thank you, my _lover.”_ She stretches out her arms towards him. “You are a miracle as well. The way you managed that whole move in such a short time. Found us such a nice house…”

"No more talking about that now, my gorgeous girl," Thorin smiles hotly as he kneels down by the sofa, stroking her big belly tenderly underneath her maternity dress.

“Would you like to help me take it off please?” She whispers excitedly. “I...would like...I mean I know we can’t really make love now but…” Dis trails off, smirking wickedly, willing her brother to read her mind, unbuttoning her dress slowly.

"I said I would take care of you and make you feel all relaxed,” he purrs as he helps her with her dress. “So just relax and let me do that.” He brushes aside the soft material and leans up to shower little kisses on the circumference of her beautiful pregnant belly and then lower onto the top of her thighs. “Spread your legs a little for me, my princess,” he murmurs through his kisses, rubbing his beard on her hot skin.

Dis does as she’s told, getting all excited about what he might just do in a second. She feels goosebumps cover her body in anticipation. The soft scratching of his beard makes it all so very special. She lays her head against the back of the sofa, concentrating on his tender touch, watching him fondly.

Thorin smiles up at her, only just able to see her gorgeous face now from behind her belly in his knelt position. Slowly he moves his kisses to the insides of her thighs, gently spreading her legs even wider. With his fingers he begins to stroke a path from one leg to the other across her panties, just teasing her heat underneath a little. “Does that feel nice, princess?”

“Oh god, yeah.” When Thorin’s finger had caressed her already swollen nether lips, she felt her juice flow out of her, moistening her underwear even more. “Do that again…” She gasps, trying to reach for him, spreading her legs as far as she can. “ _Please.”_

“How about we dispose of the lingerie … and _then_ I will do it again?” Thorin grins, pressing a kiss on her thigh again as high as he can, hampered a little by their child getting in his way. He moves her legs gently together again and helps her shift down the panties, which is not the easiest feat in their position but somehow with some shuffling they manage it between them.

“Will you let me play with you?” he asks wantonly as he helps her lean back again.

“Yes. My Thorin. _Please...a kiss...there?”_ She asks hesitantly, remembering how fantastic it had felt as she had Thorin’s lips and tongue at her intimate parts for the very first time. She gets all tingly already thinking about it.

“I will give you more than a kiss, my beautiful love,” Thorin smiles. He pulls her a little forward to the edge of the sofa as he spreads her legs again. He smiles as he looks at her beautiful intimate area. The first time he had kissed her there she had been so well groomed but now she can hardly put on her own shoes let alone shave her soft parts and he thinks the dark curls just make her look all feminine and pure as he brushes his facial hair against her coarse hair between her legs. “You smell all hot and sweet for me, my sweetheart,” he whispers, resting his head against her thigh as his fingers gently play with her, parting her swollen lips a little to feel her moist heat in between. “You make me so very hard …”

Dis moans at the tender, loving touch at her sensitive entry. It sends very pleasant shivers down her spine. _Those fingers. I love them. More please._ “I love it when you’re hard for me.” They seem to have developed a little kink for dirty speech between them. “Do you want me to help you free your beautiful cock?”

“Mm, yes please.” Thorin momentarily moves himself from where he is sat between her thighs and steps up before her so that she can pull down his zipper. “Beautiful sexy sister,” he smiles down on her as she reaches out for him.

“My favourite toy.” Dis makes a show of opening the top button of his trousers and then ever so slowly pulling down his zipper, opening his fly and then massaging the tempting, covered bulge there. She fumbles it out of the slit of his briefs, eagerly wanting to get her fingers onto that smooth, strained flesh.

“You get to play with your favourite toy in a moment … if you want to,” Thorin reaches down to stroke her face. “But first I get to play and enjoy you.” He steps out of his trousers and then kneels between her legs again, this time bending down low to press a kiss to her soft intimate lips there. He slowly sticks out his tongue and runs it just along the edges, just getting her to flutter a little for him, wanting to make it last a while this time.  

This time she moans really loudly at the wonderful, stimulating action. “ _GOD! Do ...that again, please!”_ She wants to reach for him but can’t so she grabs the cushions beside her, spreading her legs yet again very invitingly. “ _More…”_ She begs unashamedly.

He loves how she pleads with him for more stimulation, feeling comfortable enough with him to just let go of any inhibitions. He teases her outer lips apart with his fingers and this time licks a long stripe deep between them, tasting her sweet sticky juices on his tongue. _So wet for me. So wonderfully hot._

She gasps in pure bliss. _FANTASTIC!_ Bucking against him. His tongue so deep inside of her makes her see stars. So different to his cock, all soft and eager, and _curling._   Dis wriggles on the sofa, trying to get closer to him. “Love it. Love you!” 

Every little whimper, every shift of her hips, is sending equal shivers down Thorin’s spine and towards his cock. He just loves to do this for her, to give her this devoted pleasure. He loves her taste, her smell, the scorching heat against his tongue and lips. And he hopes that his next move will really make her see stars as he ever so carefully pushes a finger inside her, not daring to go too deep in fear of causing her or their child discomfort, but just enough to pleasure her soft insides too as he pushes the tip of his tongue against her clit.  

“Nnnnnnnnggggggg!!” _HEAVEN!_ She feels herself pulse against his tongue, feels her muscles gently massage his finger. “Thorin…” She breathes. That questioning tip of his tongue, exploring, caressing, loving her, makes her insides go completely to mush. “That’s heaven…”

 Thorin smiles between her legs and encouraged by her squeals of ecstasy he twirls his tongue more eagerly around that little bud so ready to bloom for him as it pulses and throbs against his tongue. _Come, my princess_ , he wishes her to hear, his mouth to preoccupied to say it.

 _Cominggg!!_ “Th...Thorin, baby, ahhhh, oh god oh god…” Dis bucks against his talented wet muscle, wanting more, getting all, completely melting under his touch, sighing, moaning, squirming lustfully. Her whole body is throbbing from the satisfaction he’s giving to her. So perfect! So him!

Thorin cannot help himself as he reaches for his own aching cock as he licks her through her climax. The words, the noises, her flood of wet nectar onto his face as she blooms so beautifully on his tongue… “Dizzy ... my Dizzy,” he moans, not getting enough from burying himself into her intimacy.  Of course he wants to be inside her, but this too is wonderfully hot, so goddamn arousing!!

Dis hears the utter arousal in her brother’s voice as she comes slowly down from her absolute high. “Let me lick you too, baby. You were perfect!” She still feels spasms and shudders run through her body. But she wants to touch him now, make him feel just as awesome. Having his face buried between her legs, his tongue oh so deep inside of her, his mouth sucking her nectar of love, his beard getting all wet, it’s the most perfect image she has in her head and heart now. 

Thorin drags his hand across his mouth and grins at her. “Are you sure, my love?” he asks though, knowing how quickly she tires these days. “I mean, I can … sort it …,” he chuckles, stroking his cock leisurely as he sits next to her.

 _As much as I love to secretly watch you jack off these days, I rather want to sort it myself. “_ No, no, I want to sort it.” she whispers and smiles dreamily, pulling his head towards her. She licks a broad wet stripe across her own palm and slides it against Thorin’s hard shaft, closing her fingers firmly around it. “Kiss me.”

Thorin beams at her, the naughtiness of that simple request buzzing in his head. _She doesn’t mind! She wants to kiss me with her sweet juices still on my lips!_ He brushes his hand across her cheek, cupping her face as he leans forward and kisses her long and deep, relishing this wonderful time with her, so many sensations, so many emotions finally answered.

Dis doesn’t mind her own fragrance on her tongue, feeling it on his lips makes it all so erotic. She lets him devour her, leaning her head back again, feeling his arousal against her tongue, in her palm. He slides his tongue against hers eagerly, moaning into her mouth as she strokes him gently at first, but then with increasing speed and pressure, sliding her palm across his twitching cock head, occasionally rubbing the pad of her thumb across that leaking slit she loves so much.

“Oh sweety, that is nice,” Thorin whispers against her lips. He leans back now and closes his eyes for a moment, just enjoying her lovely soft sleek hand around his hard member, touching him just perfectly. He rolls his hips a little, thrusting softly into her fist, both wanting to come and equally wanting this exquisite feeling to last forever.

“Come for me, my prince.” She breathes into his ear, loving his position of surrender. Dis kisses his eyelids and the few lines at the corners of his eyes ever so gently, as she keeps up the steady, now harsh pumping. “I love you so much, big brother. You make me so very happy.” She bends forward and turns a little so she can curl the fingers of her other hand around his drawn up stones.

This act requires such complete surrender, to just let go into his sister’s palm as she pulls him to his peak. And it feels so so right. “I love you too. Oh my Dizzy,” he groans louder as she cups his balls too, stimulating every bit of him so perfectly. He spreads his legs just a little and opens his eyes again, wanting to look at her, into her beautiful brown eyes, as he reaches his peak.

He leans in again, kissing her, pushing his tongue inside the moment his seed erupts from his prick. He moans and breathes heavily into her soft mouth, feeling just as one with her now as he would if he had spilled inside her. “My baby. My princess. You are my everything,” he whimpers through his shudders. He bucks his hips again through the last throbs of his orgasm and then sinks back heavily against the pillows, pulling her as close as her belly allows.

“Hmm, that was nice.” Dis wickedly grins at her brother when she makes a show of licking her palm. “You make me do such wicked things…” She would like to go again but is aware that they cannot overdo it just now. She does feel really exhausted. “How about a warm bath?”

Thorin grins at her naughty glint and even naughtier action. “You dirty little girl.” He kisses her just below her ear. “A bath would be lovely, my beautiful. Thank you for that. You make me feel so great.”

He gently caresses her swollen belly which promptly earns him a kick from within. "I think that's our little man telling me play time is over and he wants to sleep now," he chuckles.

"Oh I can just see you and the two boys playing." Dis smiles affectionately, caressing his hair with her soiled hand. "And then falling asleep together." She slowly gets up. "Don't you love how fast Fili is picking up the new language?"

“Yes, he is a bright little chap,” he says proudly. It does not feature that Fili is not his birth son; he is his sister’s and therefore Thorin considers him just as much his own and his child still inside her belly. “He can teach his new brother soon. I hope they will become the best of friends. Just like us, my precious sister,” he smiles, kissing her lips softly and then holding out his hand to help her off the sofa.

"I too hope they'll become as close as we are." When she realises what she's just said she laughs a little, "Well, maybe not _that_ close?"

Thorin chuckles too. "Maybe not quite," he agrees. "Although whomever they choose to give their hearts to I pray it will be someone as special as you are to me."

"Oh dear," Dis turns to her brother and tries to kiss him even with her belly in the way. "Kili isn't even born and we are already talking about his love life!" She smiles fondly. "Would you help me in the tub please?"

"Of course my love," he smiles as he leads her upstairs. "And I just want our sons to be as happy as I am right now." He brushes one of her curls behind her ear and kisses her brow. "My perfect little family."

Dis sighs happily. "Yes, finally."

Thorin checks the temperature, and then carefully helps his sister step into the warm water. “There is not a lot of space with you and Kilian taking up most of the bath,” he smiles. “Why don’t I just sit here on the edge and wash your hair for you?”

Dis laughs and nods as she slowly steps into the warm water, sitting down; immediately relieved when the water takes some of her tummy's weight. "Come here." She wets the sponge. "Let me clean your face." Dis strokes ever so gently across Thorin's features, smiling at the memory why his beard got so messed up in the first place.

“I guess soon there will not be much time for these quiet and pleasant moments between us,” he grins as he pours the coconut shampoo in his palm. “We will be busy with a screaming baby and a jealous little toddler I would image.”

Dis groans softly under Thorin's massage of her scalp. "If we include Fili as much as possible he won’t be jealous, I think." She slides down further into the water, closing her eyes.

“I was jealous when you suddenly appeared,” Thorin smiles as he works the soap into her thick black curls. “All of a sudden there was this screaming little human who did nothing but sleep and eat and cry. And yet everyone was cooing over you as if you were the most amazing miracle.” He kisses her shoulder. “And they were right.”

"I'm sorry," she has the urge to apologize for her behaviour for when she was a baby. She falls silent then, wondering how they'll manage with the two little ones. Then Dis looks up again into those beloved eyes. "But you have always been there for me anyway." She pulls him towards her over the edge of the tub kissing him gently.

Thorin cannot help but laugh at her apology. “You have a lot of things to apologise for when you were a child but that is not one of them. And I think I was just as bad when we were kids, winding you up, pulling your hair. But I always loved you. I remember the first time I was allowed to hold you. Suddenly it hit me, even as young as I was. I was a big brother and you were my baby sister. And I swore to you then I was always going to take care of you.” He rubs his soapy hands gently over her breasts and then her belly. “And I will. You and our boys.”

Dis feels her nubs harden as his wet, soapy palms gently stroke over them and even with their earnest conversation going on she arches a little into the touch. "I always looked up to my big brother...What would mum and dad say, I wonder, if they'd ever knew about us, like this..." She keeps hold of his hands on her belly.

“Don’t think about it,” Thorin sighs. He cannot imagine that they would have been pleased. Especially their father was a man of old fashioned values and he would probably have reeled at her divorce let alone knowing that his son had fathered a child with his daughter. “Just think about how we are happy together. That I love you more than anything in this world.”

Just then he can hear a little voice from down the corridor. “Think our little Fee got woken up by our chatting. I will go and check on him.”

Dis sighs, "And here I was thinking about doing naughty things with you yet again. But I guess we need to get used to interruptions." She considers his words about their parents. It's good then, that they don't have to lie to them too since they passed away some years ago now.

“Sorry, princess.” Thorin wraps a dressing gown around him and walks slowly over to Fili’s bedroom.

“What’s wrong, soldier?” he asks softly, blinking against the darkness for a moment until he can make out the silhouette of his stepson.

"Daddy...mummy, is she alright? I dreamed the baby crawled out of her big belly and …and then... " He wraps his little arms around Thorin's neck.

“Hey, little cowboy,” Thorin soothes, cuddling the youngster in his strong arms. “Mummy is alright. The baby is alright. Mummy is just having a bath. Why don’t I make you some warm milk and then when mummy is finished we have a little surprise for you.”

"I want to see her _NOW!!!_ Be...because she was gone an-and you and me and the baby were all alone!!!" little Fili sobs into his uncle's neck.

Thorin is taken aback by the strength of Fili’s panic. Learning to become a parent not just to a new baby, but a four year old all at once has not been easy at all. But he scoops the young boy in his spiderman pyjamas in his arms. “Of course you can see her now. Everything is fine, my brave man. Mummy is not gone.” He carries the sobbing toddler to the bathroom and slowly pushes open the door. “Look who is here to see you?” he smiles a little helplessly at his sister. He presses a kiss on Fili’s tear stained cheek. “See, there is mummy. And guess who is also there? Your little _brother_.”

"A brother?!" Fili immediately forgets his panic, seeing mummy there in the tub, smiling at him.

"Yes my little prince. You will soon have a brother." She decides to ask Thorin later why Fili had been crying. "Come here, lay your hand on my belly. He likes the bath."

Thorin lowers his nephew onto the edge of the bath where he reaches forward to put his hands on his mother’s tummy whilst he holds on to him so that he doesn’t topple forward into the bath in his enthusiasm. “That is exciting news, isn’t it?” he smiles at this lovely picture. “A little brother who you can teach to play games and teach all the new words that you have learnt.” He ruffles Fili’s blond curls. “You are going to be a big brother, just like me.” He gulps as he realises what he has just said and finds his cheeks flare.

Dis stares at her big brother with wide eyes, realising that, once the boys are older and they might start asking questions about their brothers and sister they will have to lie  For now Fili does not seem to be noticing what Thorin had said. His tiny hands feel his little brother's kicks through his mummy's skin. "What's his name?" he asks in awe.

“Well …” Thorin smiles, relieved that Fili just carries on the conversation about his new brother. “We thought Kilian. Kili for short. Like Fili and Kili in a book that mummy and I like. And when you are a bit older we will read it to you. It is a book about dragons and princes and elves and dwarves,” he beams at Fili’s excited eyes.

Dis looks fondly at her son when he says, “I like Kili!” But then he asks, “Mummy please come out of the tub so I can cuddle with you all in bed.

Thorin exchanges a somewhat desperate look with his sister. He doesn’t approve of having Fili in bed with them and besides he had hoped that he would just be able to cuddle her naked in his arms until they fall asleep together, but he understands Fili’s anxiety over the baby in mummy’s tummy. “Ehm, does mummy think that is okay?” he asks carefully.

“Fee, I’ll come out and daddy and I will bring you back to your bed and sing with you a little alright?” She strokes her son’s soft cheek. “Mummy’s belly is just too big now for us all to fit in one bed.” She exchanges a brief glance with Thorin, hoping her son will like that.

Fili looks at mummy’s belly, then back to the adults and sighs, “Alright, I am the big brother. I can do that.”

Thorin grins and picks the blond boy up again, lifting him into the air. “Exactly, you are the big brother. And you are going to look after little Kili when he comes out of mummy’s tummy and teach him all our songs. Come on then, soldier, I will go and tuck you in whilst mummy dries off.” He looks over to his sister. “Do you need help getting out?” he smiles at her.

“No, I can manage. Thank you.” She’s glad they’ve seemed to have reached an understanding for now. But she definitely has to have a plan with Thorin when it comes to the sibling question one day.


	4. Love Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is very special to me, because when I asked my co-writer Delorita to write Thorin a Love Letter as Dizzy this wasn't the only result. I am now proud to call my Dizzy my real life girlfriend as well. Love you, my princess!  
> ~Lady Luna~
> 
> When we started to write Our little Secret, I felt so very much drawn to you, it all became so close to the heart, there was only one thing to say, Yes! Yes I want to be your real life girlfriend. Love you, my Luna.  
> ~Delorita~

Dis reclines in her big favourite armchair with little baby Kili in her arms. He’s fallen asleep while drinking from her breast. She looks at Thorin, who has an equally asleep Fili in his arms, glasses still on his nose from reading him a story.

“I found something I would like to read to you.” She whispers very softly, reaching beside her, fiddling with an old worn envelope.

Thorin looks up at her curiously. “Okay. What is it?”

She starts to read hesitantly.

~♥~~♥~~♥~

 

_Dearest brother, my beloved Thorin,_

_I’m writing to you, even though I guess I’ll never be able to show you this letter. It is the eve of my sixteenth birthday and I should be really happy. I had fun and I had many guests, boys and girls. I even have a boyfriend now._

_But I’m not happy. Your visit was way too short. And the woman hanging on your arm made me feel itchy._

_I loved your hug and your gift. You just know I love beautiful flowers. The way you looked at me made me feel so very special. Unfortunately it was only such a brief moment._

_I wanted to kiss you, brother, kiss you the way my boyfriend wants to kiss me all the time. I do kiss him back though...but I want it to be you. You with your long locks and your stubbly, growing beard. I want you to hold me just as he holds me. I want his touches to be yours._

_Why do I think this way? Why do I have those crazy longings?_

_YOU ARE MY BROTHER! Everything I read, I hear, says, you cannot desire your brother like this...Well, seems like I can...I want you to caress my face as you sometimes did when I was little, I want you to kiss my cheeks… my lips… I want to snuggle up in bed with you as I did when you still lived here, feel your strong arms around me, holding me tight._

_I...I want you to see that I have breasts now…_

_Oh Thorin what should I do??_

_I’m crying and I can’t stop writing. I think I’m in love with you! The boyfriend? He means nothing. It’s just because each of my friends has one now._

_I think I will start again to go watch your footballmatches each weekend. To see you more, be more near you...to...admire your gorgeous body from afar...I so badly want to touch you in places I never should want to touch my brother…_

_I’m so very lost. Because I love you._

_Your little sister_

_Dizzy_

~♥~~♥~~♥~

 

Thorin blinks at his beloved sister, the mother of his child. "For so long?" he utters croakily. "You have felt this way about me for so long?"

She nods, tears in her eyes, smiling anyway, not able to speak though, caressing Kili’s head of dark curls.

Thorin shakes his head with a smile. "If only I'd known..." He presses a kiss on Fili's sleepy head and then says softly. "I keep a journal. Have done for many years. Mainly to record things about my travels. But there are also bits in there about you. In fact the whole thing is dedicated to you. I was going to give them to you initially. So you could read about what I'd been up to. But then I started writing things that I did not think I would ever be able to show you..." He looks at her, his eyes meeting her dark brown ones. "Would you like to see them now?"

Dis still has trouble to speak, hearing about this. Her brother’s voice as thick as hers with emotion. “Yes, please.” She whispers under her breath wondering what Thorin might have written.

"Let me put Fili to bed and I'll grab them," Thorin nods, rising to his feet with the youngster in his arms.

Dis raises too, “I’ll put Kili into his bassinet.” She suddenly has the feeling whatever Thorin is going show her, is only bearable, being in his arms.

As she comes back into the living room he’s sitting on the sofa, holding a blue diary up to her. She takes it gingerly and sits down, snuggling into his side. “You want me to read out loud?”

"If you'd like to." Thorin presses his lips against her temple suddenly feeling nervous about her finally reading his deepest thoughts and feelings.

Dis scans over the first words and starts reading her brother’s neat handwriting.

~♥~~♥~~♥~

_"My precious little sister_

_I meant this journal to be a present for you, but I know now I can never show you this, you can never read it. I need to say it to you though on this piece of paper or it will tear me apart even if you must never know._

_I love you._

_It's wrong. I know that. I'm your big brother. Of course I love my sweet baby sister. But not like this... I should never think these thoughts and dream these dreams about you, about us. But I can't help it._

_You looked so beautiful today. My little girl all grown up. I felt myself swell with pride as you showed me and mum and dad your exam results. Such a clever girl you are. You are going to do great, have a fantastic job and a great life._

_I just wish it was with me..._

_I should not be so selfish. You have a boyfriend and you seem to be so in love with him. Those glances you throw me don't mean anything, I know that. I'm just your brother._

_But every smile you give me makes me feel all funny inside. I don't feel like that around anyone else. The girls I've been with have all been lovely. But they are not you._

_I must be so sick in the head for this, but I want it to be you. I want to be with you. I want to kiss you. I want to. .. make love to you. Oh god, there I've said it. And it's so wrong, but so true. I yearn for you._

_Forgive me these thoughts, my sweet princess. I will always be a good big brother to you. No matter how far apart we are, you're always right there in my heart._

_I love you. I can say it as your brother, even if you'll never know just how much. I love you always._

_Be good, be happy, my precious little girl. For it's all that I can have, to watch you be happy with someone else from afar. In my dreams though you'll always be mine. In my dreams I will always love you the way I really want to._

_Sweet dreams my Dizzy._

_Your devoted brother, Thorin_

~♥~~♥~~♥~

Dis had stopped reading aloud at _I wish it was me._ Her tears falling freely onto the paper as she read her brother’s declaration of love from so many years ago. “My exams…” She turns and looks at him from under her moist lashes, “So many years...and...oh God, if I had just known…”

"Oh baby girl, please don't cry. I don't want you to feel sad over what we've lost. I want you to be happy for what we've gained." He tenderly strokes her abdomen which only a month and a half ago had carried their little Kili.

She sniffs, “Alright,” kissing him softly on his warm lips. “Put your sexy glasses back on and read this then.” Dis tries a tentative smile, putting her next letter into his hand.

Thorin does just that, pushing the reading glasses back on his nose as he folds out the old letter and begins to read.

 ~♥~~♥~~♥~

_My beloved Thorin,_

_I’m getting married today. You and your girlfriend will be amongst my guests, sit in the first row when I get my ring put on._

_Why can’t I, after so many years, shake the feeling that I want to marry YOU!!!!??? Why do I have to do this for appearance sake? Why can we not talk about this?_

_But you’d probably hate me after I tell you how I feel about you. That I want it to be your hands that caress me at night, that I want it to be your tongue that plays softly with my...nipples, your fingers and then your cock that slip into me when we make love. I imagine it’s gorgeous...thick and hard for me…_

_It’s always you who makes love to me in my head when I lie with my to-be-husband. That is not healthy to think that. I wish I wouldn’t. It tears me apart from the inside. I will try and be devoted to my husband. To forget you. To leave you in peace. I’m sobbing now._

_It seems like the more I forbid myself to love you the more I do._

_I equally dread and look forward to your hug today, for the moment you’ll look into my eyes with your intense blue-grey ones and wish me all the best._

_Even though my groom is so nice and lovely, my heart is broken. I live for our monthly meetings, when we can talk and laugh together, when you ever so swiftly touch my arm or my back, when your eyes shine with joy. When you whisper into my ear. “I love you, Princess.” And I just know it’s from a big brother point of view and not in the way I wish it would be. And I say it back, as your little sister, kissing you on your beardy jaw, holding on to your hand just that moment longer, to savour your touch for the weeks to come._

_I’ll always love you, big brother, in a completely different way._

_Your Dizzy_

~♥~~♥~~♥~

 

Taking the reading glasses off again it is Thorin this time who has to wipe away a tear. "I wish I'd had the guts to tell you. If I'd known then that this was how you felt I'd never had let you marry him." He cuddles her very close, burying his face in her soft hair. "And I always said it in the way you wanted it to be, even if you didn't think I did. I love you, princess. I always have."

“I know that now.” She sits up and whips his tear away with her fingertip. “And I still can’t hear it often enough.” She kisses him very gently. “But one good thing came from that marriage. We must never forget that.”

"Our Fili," Thorin nods and smiles. "Absolutely, the most amazing gift." He picks up one of his diaries again and flicks through the pages. "This is when you told me you were expecting, after all those years of trying. I'm sorry, it should have been a happier journal entry than it is..."

~♥~~♥~~♥~

 

_My precious girl, my beautiful princess_

_I keep telling myself it's none of my business. Whenever I ask you if you're happy, after all, you say yes, of course! And why wouldn't you be? You have a nice husband, a beautiful house. And now you're finally going to be a mum, after all your longing for that final piece of the puzzle. Then why don't your eyes tell me the same as your lips?_

_I should be happy for you. And I am! Of course I am. I'm so excited I'm to become an uncle. And you'll be the very best mother. And yet..._

_Does he treat you right, sister? Does he love you as much as I do? Am I just being jealous of the man who gets to make love to you, who gets to be part of your new family when I can't?_

_Do you ever think about me the way I think about you? Argh, I'm torturing myself!_

_I know my love life has been a disaster. And I feel sorry for the women I've tried to love but never could. I can only love one woman, I know that now. I live by those moments we still have together. Those moments when I feel truly happy. No-one else can give me that._

_I know I sound forlorn and sad as I write this but I'm not. I have a good life. I love my job. I love my travels. I have no complaints. There are many people alone and many more married and unhappy. I'm happy. Just be happy too, my princess. That's all I want._

_My beautiful girl, who haunts all my forbidden dreams. You must never know about all those things I want to do to you. How I want to place kisses on every bit of your soft skin. How I want you to feel how hard you make me for you. How I want us to make love from dusk till dawn, buried deep inside your heat and hear you utter my name as I pleasure you. And I want to cuddle you and the child inside you and pretend you’re both mine forever._

_In this world you may be his. But in my dreams, my sweet girl, you'll always be mine._

_Always yours, I love you, Dizzy._

_Your Thorin_

~♥~~♥~~♥~

 

“You make love to me brother.” Dis turns again when she’s able to speak. “He never really did.” She strokes his face, his chest. “When I was pregnant, he didn’t so much as kiss me. I can’t believe you even wanted me with another’s child inside of me.” She hands her last, small letter to Thorin.

~♥~~♥~~♥~

_My Prince,_

_Can you please come and rescue me? It is getting worse. The husband I thought I had, who loves me and little Fee and takes care of us...the one I thought I could learn to love back, to forget those erotic dreams I have about you, he loves alcohol more._

_I yearn for your embrace, for your kind and lovely words, for the love for me and your nephew that shines out of your eyes._

_I thought that over the years my body would become silent. That I wouldn't get all aroused and tingly once you are near me. But it doesn't. When I pleasure myself afterwards, it's with your name and_ ‘brother’ _on my lips._

_My love, please come and get us. We are desperate!_

_Your lonely Dizzy. :-(_

~♥~~♥~~♥~

 

“I wish you had talked to me,” Thorin says through real thick tears now as he folds the letter away again. “I wish you had even given me this letter. Why did you continue to suffer in a marriage that made you so unhappy, my love? You surely knew I would have helped you? As you brother …”

She helplessly shakes her head. “I don’t know. I...I wanted to, I carried it in my purse but I was afraid to lose you as well if you’d read those lines about me wanting you like that. I wanted to rewrite it when things then started to get even more chaotic…”

Thorin turns her so that he can kiss her fully. “You are the most beautiful, most wonderful, most special woman on earth, you know that? And I am just lucky that I have been given the chance to love you. Truly love you like I have always wanted to and you deserve so much.”

“Thank you, beloved.” Dis can only sob, feeling the old hurt about the mistakes in her life well up again. But she kisses her brother back, pouring all the love she’s feeling into the kiss, to make up for the lost years, her fingers twining behind his neck as to never let go again.

When they break apart for breath Thorin thumbs the last dairy a little hesitantly. “I am not sure whether to show you this. I wrote it on the day that you moved in, as you were sleeping on the sofa whilst Fili was playing. It was very much just thoughts, emotions poured onto paper.” He hands her the page nonetheless. “I love you, my precious girl,” he smiles, kissing her forehead tenderly. “You and _our_ boys.” He never even thought of Fili being another man’s child anymore these days. The four-year-old was part of his little family, his blood, and he loved him and Kili just as much.

Dis takes the last diary from him carefully, bracing herself before starting to read like it seems his final piece about her.

~♥~~♥~~♥~

_Why didn't you tell me before ?! You silly girl for keeping all your heartache to yourself! We promised to have no secrets for each other!_

_When you phoned me today my heart just broke into a million pieces. I blame myself. I should have trusted my instinct. But I know I cannot make your life choices for you sweet sister. I'm just glad that you are here now. That you are safe with me; you and Fili._

_I cannot stop looking at you, watch you sleep on my sofa. My poor sweet Dizzy. You look so tired. You look so sad. But you are still my beautiful princess._

_It took all my restraint today not to wrap my hands around my brother-in-law's throat. How dare he treat you like that. How dare he hurt my sister and my nephew. I know that's not what you want though. So I'll concentrate on trying to make you smile again. To make you feel loved again. I wish I could truly show you just how in love I am with you. Never in all these years of trying to talk some sense into myself have I stopped loving you. Not just as a brother, but so much more!_

_I want to be for you what your husband failed to be. I want to be there for you and Fili. Always. A family. I know it's ridiculous. I know it cannot be and I will not bother you with my indecent thoughts. You have enough to deal with and I will not add to your woes._

_Fili is playing so quietly. He's such a sweet little lad yet he's far too quiet for a boy his age. I promise you I will make him smile again too. I'll be the uncle I should have been for three years. And for as long as you want to live with me I'll try and be a father figure in his life too._

_Already I can't bear the thought of you leaving again. I feel I lost you once and I don't ever want to let go again. I know these are selfish thoughts. But I will cherish each moment I get to be with you, that I can imagine you are mine too hold forever._

_Sleep now, my girl. Let all your worries go for you can be happy here. And I'll keep telling you each day how much I love you, even if to you it will be the love of a brother. It doesn't matter in the end for I'm your brother too._

_Maybe someday you will learn that I loved so much more..._

_Always devoted to you._

_Thorin_

~♥~~♥~~♥~

 

“I’m so sorry you had to suffer like this too.” Dis kisses her beloved brother yet again. “Luckily we finally had the courage to get over those stupid barriers society laid on us and found each other.” She smiles into his teary, yet happily shining eyes, stroking her hand through his long hair. “I love you, big brother, my Thorin.” Her heart beats wildly in her chest when she remembers all those years of longing coming back through their letters, yet finally she can say those words out loud to her man and mean them. “I can’t believe we both wrote it down and kept it! Thank you for showing your most private thoughts to me, my prince.”

“And you, my sweet sister.” He pulls her against his chest again, stroking her back and the nape of her neck softly. “I know it feels like we have lost those years. But we still have a lifetime ahead of us, my darling girl. I am going to cherish every day with you, with my family, and make up for every missed year threefold.”

“Yes,” Dis sniffs one last time and then pads for a tissue in her pocket, determined to do just the same. “We have two healthy little boys and,” She takes his hand and kisses his fingertips, “each other, forever.” She smiles happily into his eyes.


	5. The Boys have grown up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've decided to make a big time jump because our muses wanted to write the boys :D They are now almost fifteen and nineteen.

Kili yanks the blanket back up in horrified embarrassment. “Fee!” He attempts to entangle himself in the duvet, fighting his big brother in the process. “I will get up. In a mo. Just … I just … I will be right there, okay!”

“You have been saying that since half an hour!” Fili laughs and tries to pull the blanket away. “If you don’t get up your taxi - me!” he says importantly, “will be gone and you’ll have to walk to school!” He attempts to tickle Kili out of bed, which usually works very well.

“Fine!” Kili groans, pushing his brother off. He flies out of his bed, clutching his dressing gown against him as he races to the bathroom, locking the door behind him. He leans against the door, feeling frustrated with both himself and his brother. Truth is he had been rather busy with his hand down his pyjamas when his brother came into his bedroom without knocking -which admittedly they'd never done- which was embarrassing enough in itself. But it was made all the worse by the fact that the fantasy in his head had not been of a pretty girl in class - like normal guys his age! - but of his own, gorgeous - no don’t go there! - brother. 

He turns on the shower to a cold setting, intending to rinse all these stupid thoughts from his fuzzy brain. 'That’s disgusting!' he reprimands himself. Although his body clearly does not seem to agree with his rational statement as he is still half hard. 'Shit, Kili, what the fuck is the matter with you?!' He tries his best to jack off without thinking about his brother's lush long blond curls or his well toned arms and chest but every time his thoughts keep going there again and in the end he just has to give in simply to get some relief from his aching balls and because really he is going to be late for school. And with a deep flush in his cheeks he hastily rinses the cum off his hand. 

“Morning mum.” Fili pecks his mother on the cheek. “He’ll need a little while longer, as usual.” He starts to prepare breakfast for his brother as he has done since god knows when.

“Good morning my dear.” Dis ruffles her oldest blond hair affectionately, setting a mug of black coffee in front of him.

"Has he just beat me to the bathroom again?!" Thorin growls under his breath. "I'm gonna be late for work. Again!"

"I'm here, chill!" Kili pulls open the fridge, brushing past his father as he reaches for the orange juice, hair still dripping down his back. He cannot even look at his brother right now. Not after what he's just done. Not when the image of Fili touching him where he should never touch him is still burning inside him. 'Fuck fuck fuck' pull yourself together otherwise you really should walk to school. 

Thorin hastily kisses his sister before he rushes into the bathroom to get ready for work.

Dis smiles at her busy kitchen full of her boys...no make that men! now. She has her day off and enjoys taking it slow. She looks after Thorin as he closes the bathroom door behind him. It actually wasn’t Kili’s fault that he’ll be late for work. It was hers. Early morning was still one of their favourite times to have really leisurely sex, as odd as that may sound. And even after the fifteen years they are now together like that they both can’t get enough of each other. Their love making has changed during the years. As heated as it was in the beginning, it’s now full of understanding and spoiling each other, full of smiles and reverent touches. 

She pulls herself out of her thoughts, wondering why Kili lingers against the fridge and doesn’t join his brother at the kitchen table. “Did you forget something little...Kilian?” She catches herself. Her youngest recently had demanded from all of them to not call him neither little one nor Kili. 

Fili grins into his mug when his mother slips with her wording. He has a very hard time to not use those endearments himself anymore. Because they’re just so fitting for his little brother with his deep, big brown eyes and his wild dark curls. But he remembers his very own demand to NOT be called Fili only a few years ago. But luckily he found that odd himself after a few days and changed his mind, liking his nickname.

"No why?" Kili says far too harshly. He quickly downs the orange juice and butters a piece of toast. "We gotta go," he says to his brother, toast sticking out of his mouth as he pulls on his jacket and grabs for his schoolbag. He still cannot look at Fili right now and he is equally dreading and looking forward to the short journey to school in his brother's banger.

He quickly kisses his mother on her cheek and calls bye to Thorin as they rush past each other. 

Fili swiftly puts the toast he had made for Kili into a box and shoves it into his hands. “Bye mum. Bye dad!” He calls a little louder and grabs his own bag and jacket.

He doesn’t ask 'What’s the matter with you this morning?' Because that very same question has earned him several sulky, wordless rides already. And he doesn’t like a silent Kili. In fact, he misses his joyful, talkative brother. Since a few weeks he’s in such a broody mood and Fili had started to get worried. 

When they get into the car he asks instead, “Any particular music wishes...To lighten your mood?” he can’t help but add.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kili snaps although he instantly regrets his outburst. "Whatever, I don't mind," he shrugs looking out of the window. He hates arguing with his brother. They'd always been so close, like best friends. Yet these days his emotions seemed to swing between wanting to punch and to kiss him. 

Fili sighs, starting the engine but turning off the music altogether. "I'm kinda hurt, you know, Kee." He indicates to join the traffic. "In the past you always came to me with any kind of trouble." He looks sideways at his sulking sibling. "Yet this time you rather seem to want to choke on your problem than tell me anything."  
Fili had patiently waited and endured all these days, not wanting to behave like a responsible adult, which he apparently was by now. But today he needed to say something, feeling so odd with a bad tempered brother by his side. 

Kili swallows hard at his brother's stinging words. He had not expected that at all and the truth of it hurts him too. Fili had always been his go-to for everything. But this time there is just absolutely no way he could tell his brother what the matter is. At best Fili would laugh in his face and at worst he would recoil from him in disgust and their close relationship would be ruined forever; of that he felt sure. It will pass. Maybe it's even normal, he tries to sooth his mind hopefully. But he is fairly sure that it isn't normal. And who could he ask in any case at risk for being called a sick pervert? 

He sighs, going back to staring out of the window. "I'm sorry for snapping," he mumbles an apology. "It's... I'm just not feeling well," he lies. "Play some Fallout Boy," he tries to steer the back to safer territory.

"Apology accepted." Fili looks even more worried at his brother. "Is...is it about a girl?" He doesn't like the fact that Kili isn't feeling well. "Or are you sick?" He instinctively reaches out to feel for fever on Kili's forehead.

Kili can feel his cheeks burn and he pulls his long hair in front of his face, swatting his brother's hand away. "No I'm not sick. And no..." He stops talking. Maybe if you say it's about a girl he'll stop asking questions. And then when all these stupid feelings go away you can just say you don't like her anymore. "Yes, it's about a girl," he says quietly, hoping Fili will just leave it at that. "It's fine, it's just a stupid crush and it will go away." 'I hope!'

Fili is relieved it's as simple as that, feeling for his brother's heartache though. Of course he has been there himself. In fact, is right now. But he hopes that his crush will pass. "Maybe asking her if she likes you might help? Sometimes girls like that approach." He drives into the school's parking space, cursing that they're so late when he has to circle around until he finds an empty spot. 

"Nah, h...she doesn't. We're just friends, it’s cool,” Kili mumbles, cringing at his near slip up. “Gotta run, thanks for the lift, bro,” he hastily says as soon as they are stopped and he rushes out of the car towards his class.

Fili stares after him for a moment. 'What has gotten into you, little one?' When he walks after his brother he realises that Kili isn't at all little anymore. In fact he almost has to look up at Kili now. His shoulders have grown a bit broader and there is a dark shadow forming on his upper lip. 'You're really growing up, little one.' Fili thinks fondly and smiles.

+++

Kili hovers outside his brother's bedroom. He is not even sure why; all the things he wants to say he can never say. But so many weeks have passed now without his feelings getting remotely less. In fact pretty much everything Fili does or says only makes it a hundred times worse. He hangs on his brother's every word these days like it's oxygen. He is so clever. So thoughtful. So kind. So handsome! 

He knows there are many girls who take a shine to his big brother. When Fili had his first girlfriend it had annoyed Kili because his brother spent a little less time with him playing computer games or going for bike rides or down the skate park with him. Still these girlfriends never seemed to last long to the point where even their parents joked that they could not keep up with who was his latest flame. 

And now the idea of a girl flicking her hair for his brother, giggling in that annoying coquettish way and... kissing him. He cannot stomach that thought 

'So exactly why are you standing here, Kilian? Because you're going to declare your undying love for your own brother, you freak?! Of course not. '

He sighs and is just about to turn round and go back to his own room when he hears movement in his brother's room and then a soft groan. And suddenly he finds himself nailed to the spot. Their mum and dad are out. He knows Fili is alone. And that noise.... In his sweet voice... Is he?! He knows he should turn around and come back later - if at all! But his legs simply won't respond. Instead he leans even closer to the door, trying to catch every faint sound as his heartbeat thrums in his ears.

Fili tries to stifle his moans, knowing Kili might hear him in his room when the house is silent otherwise. But he needed the relief of his own hand so badly. Ever since that day a few months ago, when Fili started to realise his brother is growing into a man, he had those flashing images of Kili in the shower or in the tub. Of him skateboarding like a whirlwind, muscles playing beneath his skin, coloured from the sun, sweaty all over. They liked to compare their skills in all kinds of sports, sometimes with other friends, sometimes only the two of them. And just recently Fili became aware that he didn't need yet another girlfriend. That he was perfectly comfortable with only Kili around. As odd as that might sound. 

Girls were exhausting. They only ever wanted things he was seldom interested in, like shopping, going to parties, showing their boyfriends off. 

Whereas with Kee he could do the things he likes most when he didn’t have to study for his exams. Kee who became even more handsome with each day, each day more desirable. A dark shadow now not only above his upper lip but at his jawline as well. His hair almost as long as their father’s, sometimes pulled back in a tiny ponytail, which makes Fili’s fingers itch to caress his slender neck. 

Fili groans really loudly as he has both his hands on his cock and balls, not able to shove his fist into his mouth as he had managed before. “Kili...Kee…” It comes just out as a breath as his body is wrecked by an almost painful orgasm.

Kili gasps out loud, his nose now pressed against the door, his own hand down his boxers, grabbing his dick hard. 'Did he just say my name? ' His legs feel like jelly as he orgasms inside his underwear, biting his lip hard so not to groan. He sways softly, not really satisfied, just frustrated, wanting so so badly to just throw open the door and press himself hard against his brother. 'Your mind is playing tricks! Of course he did not say your name, you sick bastard!' And he cannot stifle the frustrated sob that tumbles from his lips.

Fili stops mid move, biting his tongue. Was there someone at his door? He swiftly yerks his boxers back up and sits upright, cleaning his stained hands on his jogging bottoms and flinging them into the corner, grabbing for his discarded maths book. “Kilian?” 'He really could get over this name thing at some point soon!' He much prefers Kili. 

Kili stumbles backwards over his own feet as his brother calls his name. 'Fuck! He heard me!' He hits the bannister painfully with his side before he manages to regain his footing and race back to his own adjacent room, trying to close the door as quickly and quietly as he can manage before throwing himself onto his bed face down, grabbing for one of his school books willing his breathing and heart beat to slow down.

Fili hears the noise outside clearly now. Kili stumbling and then running, closing his door. He knows all these movements by heart. Having heard them since the day Kili started to walk on his own tiny feet. They’ve changed so often over the years but now they really make Fili’s heart flutter. No matter if common sense says falling in love with your own brother is just nonsense and wrong. Fili shakes his head and gets up, paying a visit to the bathroom first to wash his hands. 

He’s about to just walk into Kili’s room when it suddenly occurs to him that that may not be appropriate anymore with an almost fifteen year old. Should he knock from now on?

“Kili? Can I come in please?” He decides to ask, feeling all wobbly on his own feet all of a sudden.

Kili feels every cell in his body tense and it makes him feel quite sad. Fili had been his comfort blanket for as long as he remembered, the brother whom he would share all his secrets with. And now he could not even look at him without going an unhealthy shade of red and feeling all this inappropriate stirring. Can I come in? YES! NO! He balls his fists anxiously, then realises he has to give an answer either way or his brother will just worry and come in anyway. “Er, yeah sure,” he says, trying to sound casual, even bored and uninterested, though his own voice sounds ridiculous to his own ears.

Fili takes in the bundle of nerves on the bed. Kili looks just like I feel. I wonder if…

“Bro, I think we need to talk.” Kili’s flinch makes his heart hurt. “I mean talk like adults. You and me, as before, no secrets.” Fili sits himself cross legged in front of Kili’s bed on the floor. “Do you think we can manage that again?”

Kili slowly turns his head and nods. He is not sure what Fili wants to talk about but he can guess is about him listening and how disgusting and wrong that is. And suddenly he cannot hold his tongue anymore, wanting to sob but his pride and male hormones instead trying desperately to find a way out of this situation. “I … I am sorry, Fee, I … I was going to ask you something and then I heard … But I was going to go back to my room and then I stumbled. But I am very sorry to have interrupted you.” He buries his face in his pillow, knowing he is bright red again. “Can we please talk about something else?” he mumbles against the fabric.

“No we cannot.” Fili wants to gently stroke his hand across his brother’s back but he doesn’t. Not yet. Not until he knows for sure. “I’m not mad at you, Kee,” he says softly, deliberately not using Kilian.

Kili slowly dares lift one eye enough to look at his brother through his curtain of hair. “Okay,” he says softly. “I didn’t mean to. I … I will make sure I knock if ever ...” 'Just stop talking!' He still cannot turn himself over, unsure just how much of a mess he made of himself and how much will be shown. Now that would be embarrassing!

Fili sighs. 'This is going nowhere near I want it to go.' “Kee, you know… I… We…” 'Shit, why is this so hard? Because if I’m not right, he might never talk to me again.' Fili decides for a gesture that might be neutral, since he did this since Kili had started to grow his hair. He reaches out and strokes the brown curtain away from his brother’s face. His heart thumping in his ears. “You’re very handsome, brother,” he whispers softly.

Kili blinks at his brother with huge eyes, but the rest of his body feels like it has frozen solid. Handsome? As in … Does he too …? “Y-you are too …” he manages to squeeze from his lips in a broken whisper back. 'Is he just being kind? Am I reading things that aren’t there?'

“I like being with you.” Fili swallows. “I like being with you a lot.” He’s searching for any kind of reaction other than his brother’s cute shyness. “Do...do you like being with me? Do you not think it odd for us to stick together for as often as we can?” 'Please someone help me to not mess this up! To let me still have a brother if my assumptions are wrong!' Fili takes his hand away again and fumbles with the pages of Kili’s book nervously.

Kili cannot handle himself any longer. His brother’s words. His sweet touches… His curls falling along his face as he looks at that book without actually looking at it. And he moves himself quick as a cat and suddenly his lips are pressed against Fili’s. Awkwardly. Inexperienced. Needily.

'Thank god!!!' Fili instantly grabs for his brother’s head and holds him there. Lips sealed together for a moment. Then he lets go, wondering what will happen next. He’s tempted to kiss Kili for real but is also afraid that might scare him away. He curls his mouth into a smile, sneaking his fingers gently around Kili’s forearm.

Kili feels the weight of the world slide from his shoulders when he sees that beautiful smile. “You … you liked that?” he asks unsurely. "You like me? I mean, not as a brother ... "

Fili can’t say anything. He leans in close and captures those sweet lips with his slightly open mouth, sliding his tongue softly across Kili’s. His fingers curling into those wild locks he loves so much.

Kili closes his eyes and just gives himself over to his brother’s kiss, doing what comes naturally to him, to let Fili teach him, guide him as he deepens the kiss even more. His whole body seems to tingle as he moves himself even closer, no longer caring about how his cock is reacting to these feelings he has for his brother. He wants this too! He wraps his arms around Fili’s neck, pulling him close, needing him so so badly.

“Boys? We’re home!” Thorin’s deep voice rings through the house.

Fili instantly stops that beautiful, soft, sweet first kiss, winking at Kili, shuffling himself onto his bed, back leaning against the wall, taking his book as they have done forever when Kili had trouble with school stuff. “We’re coming down in a min.” He calls back, trying to behave normal, when all he wants to do is snog his little brother into oblivion.

Kili sighs, leaning back against the pillows. He feels frustrated with his parents of course that they interrupted that wonderful kiss - his first ever kiss! But knowing now that his brother feels the same about him …

Of course it is still weird. But he doesn’t care anymore. All he cares about right now is that Fili wants to kiss him too. That he is sitting here on his bed, so close, so safe, no awkwardness between them, just something very very special.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kili written by LadyLuna  
> Fili written by delorita


	6. A Secret No Longer

"Kee!" Fili calls loudly from the living room. "Come down here fast! You won't believe what I just found!" The blond looks stunned at the documents he's holding in his hands. He was searching for his own birth certificate to send a copy of to an university when his eyes fell on something else that made him gasp.

Kili races down the stairs upon his brother's call. "What's up?" He blows some of his long fringe out of his face as he kneels down next to his brother, his secret lover, who has a pile of papers spread around him.

He'd turned fifteen just over a week ago and they had spent almost every evening kissing in either of their rooms, their love for each other growing each day.

"This, my sweet little one," Fili kisses his brother softly, sneaking his tongue into his mouth for a few moments before speaking again, "is proof that we aren’t doing anything wrong," he gasps excitedly. "I accidentally found mum and dad's birth certificates...look! Look at the names of their parents!" Fili still can't believe what he's reading on those documents.

Kili yanks the papers out of his brother's hands and stares at them in utter shock. "That can't be... There must be a mistake. This says.... They are... "

"Brother and sister..." Fili whispers still in shock, staring at those identical names of what would have been their grandparents. "I mean, I knew dad isn't really dad because I vaguely remember calling him uncle. But this..." He suddenly grins and turns to Kili, taking his face with those big stunned eyes into his hands. "This means we don't have to hide this in front of them. We just can....hmm..." He kisses his brother deeply.

But Kili cannot share Fili's enthusiasm. _They lied to us! All these years! There's me thinking I was some freak. Well it's no wonder!_

He looks at Fili with confusion in his eyes. "Thorin is not our real dad?" He tries to get his head around what little information Fili has given him.

Now Fili is the one who looks at his brother wide eyed. "I...I thought they told you?" He gently caresses Kili's cheek. "Let's see..." He rummages through the folder and holds both their certificates up. "Same stupid father...."

Kili feels like his whole world is crumbling around him. The man he thought was his father isn't ... No, he is his uncle! "I need to get some air," he gasps and jumps to his feet and grabs for the keys to his bike lock.

"No, baby, wait! Here's more...Divorce papers." Fili grabs Kili's hand. Something is nagging at his brain. Something just doesn't sit right with him. He tries very hard to remember. "Look at those dates. And when you were born..."

Kili looks at what his brother is showing him but his brain hurts too much to make sense of any of it. "What do you mean?" he asks suspiciously.

"Kiss me, maybe that will help me remember." Fili can't get enough of those soft, still a little inexperienced lips and tongue. He looks at Kili pleadingly.

"Alright," Kili sighs. At least kissing is nice and soothing. He wraps his arms around his brother and leans forward to press their lips together when Fili's eyes blow wide.

"Kissing....They were kissing...And then there were cookies, lots of cookies and dad...I mean uncle _Thorin!_ asked if I would call him daddy..." He leans his forehead against Kili's. "Mum wasn't pregnant...or at least not that I could see back then..."

Kili feels his stomach churn as it dawns on him what Fili is implying. "So who IS my dad? _This_ guy?" he points at his birth certificate. "Or.... Thorin. Mum's brother?!"

"I have no idea. I guess we have some serious questioning to do when they'll be back from work."   

Kili nods. "C-can we sit down and cuddle for a moment?" he asks shakily. The whole situation between the two of them and their secret kisses and cuddles had felt complicated enough. But now he feels like his entire identity has been torn to shreds. _I don't even know who my father is. And if Thorin is my father and my uncle ... I really am a freak!_

Fili takes his brother's hand, pulls him up and leads him towards the sofa. He sits down in the corner of the large furniture and cuddles Kili close, wrapping his arms around him as he always had, burying his nose into his hair.

"I love you, Fee," Kili mutters softly, closing his eyes. "Will you still love me? No ... no matter what?"

"Oh Kee..." Fili turns his brother in his arms, surprised about that sweet declaration of love just now. "I love you. I always have and I always will!" He brushes his lips softly against Kili's, stroking his hair out of his face. "Why do you think I would stop loving you?"

"Dunno," Kili shrugs. "I'm just confused about everything right now." He closes his eyes again and smiles a little at the fact that Fili loves him too. Always, no matter what. "Thanks."

"Thank you for telling me that you love me, little brother." Fili smiles into those confused brown eyes and kisses him again when he suddenly hears the front door opening and closing.

"Boys! I'm home!" Dis walks into the living room to put the plant she's just bought onto the window sill as she stops mid step, seeing her sons cuddled together on the sofa in a loving embrace, lips pressed together.

  _Sweet Jesus!_

The plant hits the floor with a loud crash.

The boys spring apart in an instant but whereas Fili is ready to apologise and explain themselves Kili is already on his feet, towering over his shocked mother. "And don't you dare say anything about it, you hypocrite!" he snarls, all the build-up emotions firing up inside him.

Dis swallows, "Kili...I...." as she takes a step back, even more shocked by her youngest wording, she almost slips on a sheet of paper, seeing all the documents on the floor.

"Mum," Fili gets to his feet too. "I was looking for my birth certificate for university when I found...." he swallows, for some reason not as upset as Kili, just terribly sad, "yours too..." _There. It's out in the open._

"Looks like I'm not the only one wanting to kiss my brother," Kili bites. He just doesn't know what to do with his emotions right now. He wants to rant and scream and cry all at once. "It's all your fault!" he rages.

"Kili, please, I'm so sorry!" Dis reaches for him, his agony instantly becoming hers. She's not able to say anything else right now.

"Sorry for what?" Kili seethes, stepping out of her reach. "For lying to me all my life? For making me believe that Thorin is my dad when in fact he is my uncle." He has to bite back his tears as his voice breaks. "So who IS my dad?" he demands although he's not sure if he wants to hear the answer.

Dis says very quietly, not sure if it is the right thing to do with Thorin not around, but not able to help herself, “Thorin _is_ your dad.” Tears start to unfocus her sight and she has the feeling her happy life is torn apart by the lie they both have built. “He’s also my brother, yes.” She walks over to the sofa and sinks down. “You are the child of our love, Kili.” She looks between her sons. “I’m so sorry for not telling you all of this.”

Fili feels a big knot form in his throat, stepping close to his brother, hugging him, rubbing his back soothingly. “What am I then, mother?”

“Oh Fili, you’re our baby too. We love you just as much as we love Kili.” She sobs, wishing Thorin would be here _now_. “You both are our life. Please believe me.” She wants to hug her boys but feels their rejection radiate from them.

“Why?!” Kili shouts. “You’re … you’re disgusting!” He is not even sure why he is saying this, other than that his own confused emotions about how he feels about his brother are manifesting themselves in this blame towards his parents. “Just leave me alone!” And he rushes up the stairs, slamming his bedroom door shut behind him.

Fili looks forlornly at his mother, his arms empty.

"Would you sit with me please, Fee?" Dis pleads. "I don't know what else to say than that I love you all so very much." She sobs and wraps her arms around her adult son as he sits down beside her.

He hesitantly mirrors the gesture, his eyes moist too. "But why didn't you tell us? You raised us not to lie and our whole lives are built on the biggest lie there is!" He holds his mother at arm's length. "Kee's behaviour those last months? Would have never happened if he'd known you're...brother and sister..." He looks away. "He wouldn't have had all this heartache for thinking he is a freak, loving his brother like this… and neither would I..."

Dis sighs, "Oh Fee!" She wishes she could turn back time and do things differently.

“So why didn’t you tell us? Because you are ashamed? Should we feel ashamed? About you? About who Kili’s father is? About … about ourselves?”

“We were gonna tell you at Kili’s sixteenth birthday.” Dis carefully strokes her fingers through Fili’s blonde curls. “I don’t know why we waited for so long. Maybe, maybe because it is so difficult...because everybody says _you shouldn’t love your sibling like this_...In some countries...the country we moved away from, you go to prison for loving your brother like this.” She really starts to cry now, burying her face into her hands. “Definitely not be ashamed!” Dis sobs under tears. 

"Oh mum," Fili puts his arm around his mother. "I hate to see you upset. Hate to see Kili upset." He awkwardly rubs her back, suddenly feeling very grown up indeed.  "He's not _my_ father, is he," he says very softly. He is sure he already knows the answer but he needs to hear it from his mother now.

Dis shakes her head. “I wish he would be though.” She takes Fili’s hand. “I’ve always loved Thorin more than a sister should. Therefore, I tried to put a stop to it by marrying your father...But he...he…” She just keeps shaking her head and cries silently. “But hasn’t Thorin been a good father to you all these years? To both of you?” She manages to get out after a few moments.  

"Yes, mum, he has. And even if he's not my biological father, he'll always be dad." He knows he should be happy that he's not the offspring of an incestuous relationship and yet, "I wish … I wish he was my real dad too," he admits, feeling his eyes brim again.

Thorin slowly pushes open the door to the living room, having caught the end of that conversation. As soon as he sees all the papers on the floor and his sweetheart and beloved stepson in tears on the sofa he knows at least some of their secret is out. "Fili," he says quietly, startling the both of them. "You'll always be my son. It takes more than just making a baby to be father."

Fili looks up at Thorin in shock. “You heard that?”

Dis is around her beloved’s neck, still not able to stop sobbing, pulling him with her onto the sofa so she can put her arms around each of them. “We need to talk to Kili, he just fled…”

"What happened? I just heard Fili say that he wishes I was his real dad..."

"They kissed...."

"We found your birth certificates...."

Both speak simultaneously.

"Whoah what? You found our birth certificates." Thorin’s eyes grow wide as he digests that piece of information. "I see... And _they kissed?_ Who is they?" he looks from one to another.

"I was looking for mine because I needed to send it somewhere, I didn't mean to search through your stuff, sorry." Fili feels like apologising for causing this drama in the first place. "Kili and I kissed." He says proudly now, looking Thorin straight in the eyes. "That's how mum found us." He squares his back for whatever kind of answer would come from his stepfather.

Dis bites her lip, leaning back, staring from one to the other.

"What? Why?!" _Because they found our birth certificates? I’m so confused, what’s going on?!_ He looks to Fili for an explanation.

"We kissed, because we're in love, dad. I needed to comfort him. He's almost fifteen years old and just found out that his parents, _OUR parents,_ were lying to us all our lives... " Fili looks challenging at Thorin. "Plus he thought you are not his father...."

"I told him that you are," Dis says softly, praying this situation will be sorted in a good way.

Thorin takes a long deep breath, trying to take in all of this information in one go. “Please can you give me a moment with your mother,” he says eventually.

"Of course. I'll clean up this mess." Fili crouches on the floor while the other adults leave the room.

+++

 “Kilian?”

Kili cringes when he hears his father’s deep voice outside his bedroom door, followed by a curt knock. “Go away! I don’t want to see you! Ever! Fuck off!” He rolls himself into a ball when he hears the door open anyway, pulling the blanket over him. “I said go away!” he roars.

Thorin takes in his angry son with a heavy heart. He sits himself on the edge of the bed, trying to gather his thoughts for a moment, before he says. “I am sorry you found out by accident. Your mother and I had agreed to tell you when you were sixteen.”

“I don’t want to know!” Kili growls, pushing his pillow against his ears.

But Thorin continues in his low, soothing and rational voice. “I understand your anger. It must have been such a shock. Can we please talk about this, Kili?”

“No!”

Thorin sighs deeply. “Okay. Then I will talk about it and you can just listen. I love your mother very much. I know a lot of people see it as wrong ... or disgusting ..."  he says, with a painful stab in his heart as he recalls Dis’ heaving sobs when she had told him what had happened and what the boys had said. 

“Then why did you make me? When you knew it was wrong?” Kili sobs.

“We didn’t mean to. It was an accident. It was the first time we were intimate and although we knew we shouldn't we both wanted to because we love each other so very much. And we've never regretted it," he says honestly, wanting Kili to understand how special that night in which he was made was without being too explicit. "And when your mother told me that she had fallen pregnant with you … To me it did not feel wrong. It felt like a blessing. And I knew from that very moment that I was going to love you so very much. You and your mother and Fili. That I wanted us to be a real family. You were so wanted. We gave up everything to make that happen. Left behind our friends, our jobs, our country, so that we could try and be the best family for you and your brother that we could be.” He looks at the head of dark curls sticking out above the blanket. “l love all three of you so very much, Kilian. No matter what other people might say, to me it cannot be wrong to love someone so deeply.”

At that Kili slowly slides the blanket down a little, looking at his father through watery eyes. He had always been so close to this man, he looked up to him so much. He wants Thorin to be his father. Despite the shock of finding out about all this, he had felt immensely relieved when Dis had said that Thorin was his real father, not some man he'd never known and who clearly didn't want him. “I love you too,” he mumbles.

“Come here then,” Thorin opens his arms, wondering if the teenager will accept the embrace. He feels an enormous relief when Kili does and he holds him close. “I am sorry that you feel hurt and betrayed. We meant you no wrong. We did what we thought was right for you and Fili."

“I am a freak,” Kili sobs against his father’s chest. “It’s all your fault.”

Thorin pushes up Kili’s chin, making him look at him. “You are _not_ a freak. You are a healthy young man who is so very loved by his family. Don’t ever think otherwise.” He kisses his head of curls and cuddles him again. “What is all my fault, Kilian? Tell me what else is on your mind.”

“Fili,” Kili blurts out. “Did mum not tell you?”

“That you two were kissing? Yes, she did. In fact Fili told me,” Thorin sighs, rocking the slender boy gently in his arms.

“It’s your fault!” Kili sobs again.

“My fault?” Thorin asks, genuinely confused.

“Yes! There … there is something wrong with me! I shouldn’t want to kiss my own brother! But you and mum, you made me like this!”

Thorin bites his lip not to laugh. But he feels such a sadness for his son that he feels that way. “Oh, Kilian, don’t be silly. This isn’t a disease or something you inherited from us. It's not in our genetics whom we fall in love with. I … I was surprised and perhaps a little shocked to hear that you and Fili feel like that. I had wished for a more conventional relationship for the both of you, not because I dismiss it - that would indeed be very hypocritical. But because I know how hard it will be. Your mother and I did not hide the fact that we are siblings for nothing.”

“What do I do now?” Kili rubs his eyes dry, feeling suddenly so young and forlorn as Thorin brushes his hair out of his face.

“You are both young, Kilian. We all have crushes that pass again over time. Don’t rush into anything. Try and have an open mind. But, if you really feel like that about Fili … He is your half-brother. Some people will react badly. But you must follow your heart and if he is the one who is going to make you happy …” He takes a deep breath. He really does not want his sons to fall in love with each other. It is too hard. Too complicated. But, “… then mum and I will be happy too,” he promises, knowing that he cannot make any other promise.

“Thank you,” Kili sighs, smiling a little bit.

“Will you come downstairs and speak to mum? She is crying so much over the fact that you are so angry with her.”

“I am not angry with mum,” Kili shakes his head. “I am angry with myself. With this stupid world.”

“I spent too long being angry with the world,” Thorin shakes his head too. “Don’t be. Just be happy that you have people around you who love you more than anything. Okay?”

“Okay,” Kili nods.

+++

Kili shuffles his feet a little. “I am sorry, mum, I didn’t mean to get so angry earlier or say the things I did.” He slowly raises his eyes to meet his mother’s.

"Oh come here, little one." Dis finally takes her not so little son into her arms, holding him close. "I'm sorry too, for not telling you our deepest secret earlier." She locks her gaze with Thorin, the man she still loves as much now as fifteen years ago. In fact probably all her life.

“I understand,” Kili sighs. He cuddles his mother tight, relieved that she is not angry with him for his harshly spoken words. “Dad explained everything.” He looks to his father and then back to his mother. “Thank you for everything you have done for me and Fee.”

Dis is smiling through her tears up into Kili's dark eyes. "Thank you so much for understanding." She hugs him really close. Then she pulls Fili into their embrace as well, "And you too. We're so happy to have you both."

“So … you’re okay with Fili and me?” Kili asks carefully as he threads his fingers through his brother’s.

Fili holds on tight to his brother, curling his other arm around his mother’s waist, anticipating her answer.

“Of course I am, how could I not be?” She loosens the embrace a little to look at both of them. “Just...just be careful out in the open. Even here there are lots of people still who don’t understand sibling love.” She says sadly.

Thorin clears his throat as he puts cups of tea down for the four of them. “And I expect you both to still behave appropriately,” he says, looking at both his sons sternly, but in particular Fili. “Kili is only fifteen,” he reminds him.

“I know what you mean, dad.” He blushes. “We didn’t do anything inappropriate.” _Yet._

“We’re only kissing, dad,” Kili says, feeling his cheeks colour. But he feels such happiness that they are having this conversation openly; that both his parents are accepting of his love for his brother. And Fili’s in return for him. He beams at Fili, wanting to kiss him right now. But that he won’t do.


	7. Perfection

Once in their bed Dis lies her head on her man's chest, softly stroking his still flat stomach. "I'm glad it is all finally out in the open," she says, lost in thought. "I can't believe our boys are in love with each other though." She sighs, "Maybe it _can_ be inherited?" and looks up into his eyes.

Thorin plays with her curls as he thinks about this. "I don't know," he has to admit. "They're just teenagers though. I'm sure they'll grow out of it. They're just experimenting." _I hope._

 _"_ I don't think so. _"_ She smiles stroking his now silver beard. "Look at us. I was in love with you at fifteen and I still am, forty years later." Dis brushes her lips against his. "Madly so."

"Madly so," Thorin agrees, kissing her back long and deep. "So you really are okay with it? Even though we know how hard it will be for them, if not harder?"

“Well, we can’t do anything to stop them, can we?” Dis strokes his silver hair fondly, remembering how she had told him no, I don’t want you to cut it as he’d asked her if he should, at his age.

“No, we can’t,” Thorin says softly, moving his lips along her jawline and then down her neck. “I just want the best for both of them.” His hand gently strokes down her side, over her hips. “I am sorry I wasn’t home earlier. It broke my heart to see you so upset.”

Dis enjoys his gentle touch immensely, so soothing and comforting still, after all those years they now have made love together. “It was such a shock to see them together like that on the sofa.” She blows faint kisses all along his chest. “My first thought was _No! That just can’t be!”_ She looks at him again. “Kili is still so young…”

“Fili will look after him though,” Thorin tries to reassure her in turn now, although he’d felt the same. “He won’t do anything he shouldn’t. I hope…”

“Our Fee is a very responsible young man.” Dis lets her hand wander along Thorin’s thigh now, something stirring inside of her, taking over her brain. “Our Kee can sweet talk him into anything though…”

"I'll have a chat with Kili," Thorin promises. "At least... " he strokes the inside of her thigh now, "… they can't get pregnant," he winks at her.

She laughs, sliding her leg across his, leaning into the feather light touch. “Oh god, I thought exactly the same.” Dis becomes serious again. “That would mean no grandchildren though…” She closes her eyes, shakes her head. “I guess I’d better do not go there yet.” To distract herself she starts to let her tongue slide across his nipple and her fingers stroke the outlines of his balls through his jogging bottoms. “You’re one sexy piece of man.” She whispers naughtily.

"Even with all my grey hairs?" he grins back, enjoying her loving touches so much. "I thought Fili liked girls..." he struggles to focus on one thing with so many thoughts racing through his head still.

Dis sits up, “Yes, _because_ of all your grey hairs.” She looks at him earnestly. “You’d rather talk a little more? I can keep my hands to myself.” She smiles lovingly at him. “I’m so happy you were able to talk Kili round. It was so terrible when he suddenly rejected us. For a moment I thought our beautiful family would break apart because we made one stupid mistake… but how could we have known when it was best to tell them?”

"What's done is done, princess. Kili is a confused adolescent. I think his feelings were far more about him and Fili than you and me. But I had this very clever and beautiful girl telling me once that it is good to talk about things."

“You know,” Dis leans forward again, to kiss her brother once more, “with you complimenting me like this I can’t decide if I’d rather want to talk _with_ you or make love _to_ you, my beautiful man.”

"Hm, I think we've done quite enough talking for today and I'm sure there will be lots more talking to do. So that leaves the other option," he grins, flipping her onto her back and crawling on top of her.

“Hm, yes.” She encircles her legs with his, taking his face gently into her hands. “Make love to me, big brother, please.”

"I still love to hear you saying that," Thorin purrs, his cock already swollen from her ministrations. He pushes down pyjama bottoms, wriggling his legs out of them. Slowly he grinds his semi hard cock against her pelvic mound.

“Big brother?” She opens her legs wide so he can rub himself against her moist softness. Dis so badly wants him inside, aching for it, moving slowly against him, feeling him swell to full hardness. “I love to say it.” She pushes her tongue deep into his mouth and coaxes his to play with her. And Thorin lets his tongue twirl around hers slowly at first, enjoying the so familiar taste and sensation that he will never tire of.

"My lovely little sister," he sighs into their snog.

“Hmm, yeah,” Dis playfully sucks the tip of his tongue into her mouth, caressing it with hers. The tender touches sending sparks through her breasts and down into her nether parts. She’s positioning herself just so, to have him slide into her easily any moment now. “Please say that again,” she moans.

Thorin grins heatedly. "What?" he purrs as he enters her wet heat. "That you are my lovely little sister whom I want to make love to all night?" he groans as she grips him and pulls him deep inside of her.

“Yeaahhhhhhh!” She breathes out way too loudly, feeling her brother’s gorgeous cock rub her insides so deliciously slow. “My Thorin…” Dis whispers close to his lips, twining her legs around his hips, digging her heels into his sweet arse to push him even deeper. “I want to feel you inside of me all night long.” She grins, holding his gaze. “Thick and hard.” She flutters her muscles deliberately.

"Oh, dirty girl,"Thorin smirks, still loving the fact that his sister feels so comfortable with him that she enjoys that. He puts his hands on either side of her and pushes himself up to ride himself deep into her lovely wet channel. "You're still so beautiful. You still make me so hard for you," he groans in between his thrusts.

“Hap...Oh _God!! ..._ Happy you say that.” She clings to him, feeling the sweat slick up their bodies. “Even with...hmmm...all...those damn...wrinkles…” As she murmurs this, she strokes her thumbs across his, especially those from laughing at the corners of his eyes. “I love you so much, brother.” She gives herself over to the deep, slow thrusts. They reach her very core and she’s getting more and more aroused by it, slicking him up from the inside.

"Oh baby sister, I love you too, so so much. I love all your wrinkles and grey hairs. You're so sexy," he kisses her lips, rolling his hips to penetrate her in the way that he knows pleasures her most. "Want to come with you, princess."

“Oh _yes!!_ ” She meets his thrusts, “Please my prince, faster…” She can only gasp, feeling the familiar tingle of the build of her orgasm all over and inside her body.

He loves that gentle slapping of their bodies together, how her body invites him, blooming and pulsing around his aroused cock. He loves the sheer pleasure in her eyes, her red swollen lips and the flush in her cheeks.

And he lets all of those images and sensations flood his body as he grunts his climax against her shoulder.

She’s pressing his head against her collarbone as his climax wrecks his body and trips her with him over the edge. His dick trembling between her hot neither lips, releasing that bittersweet juice of life she loves so much. “Thorin!” she whimpers against his ear, “so...so good…”Dis trembles and shakes with the utmost pleasure, clinging to him to make them one, pulsing around him.

No matter all the drama, this still feels absolutely perfect, his sweet beloved wrapped around him as they enjoy that moment of utter bliss together, the flow of her juices mixing with his own. He shudders as he slowly rests himself down, kissing her soft and tender. "Thank you, my sweet princess. That was so nice."

“Hm, that was more than nice,” she tangles her fingers into his hair. “That was perfect, lover,” she teases him. “You are perfect.”

"Not as perfect as you," he smiles, caressing her still soft skin. "You know, I'm glad that our boys finally know the truth. Because I'm so proud to be both your brother and your partner. You've made these last fifteen years the happiest years of my life." He softly kisses her nose and then lips again.

Dis sighs happily, wrapping her arms around his neck to hold him really tight against her. “Thank you.” She whispers. “You’re right, even in a foreign country, those years since our Kili was born were the happiest in my life too.” She strokes his beard gently, never can get enough of it. “I’m very glad they know now. It was really hard sometimes not to tell, as they’ve been always so close.”

“Yes it was and I hated it that we needed to keep it a secret from them. As if we agreed with the rest of the world that our love is wrong.” He plays with her curls as they slip apart. “Nothing has ever felt more right than being with you.” He rolls onto his side and cuddles her close into his arms, kissing her head of curls. “Sleep well, my princess,” he murmurs, tired now from their lovemaking and the whirlwind of emotions he had walked in on today. After all he is no longer the young man he once was.

She thinks about his words. _As if we agreed with the rest of the world that our love is wrong._ “Nothing is more right than this.” She snuggles against his warm body, sneaking her arm around his waist, murmuring, “Good night, beloved.” and falls asleep.

+++

"Fee?" Kili whispers softly as he pushes open the door a little further.

“Kili!” Fili’s eyes snap open as he’s ripped out of his almost slumber. “What are you doing in here?”

Kili tiptoes over to his brother's bed and crawls under the duvet without hesitation, just like he used to when they were just kids. "I wanted a cuddle," he grins.

“But Kee…” Fili tries to protest but he instinctively pulls his brother closer, having missed this in all the weeks they just stole kisses during the day, never really settling in one of their rooms. It had been much easier when there wasn’t that sexual tension between them.

"This is nice," Kili ignores his brother’s feeble protest. He snuggles into his arms and seeks Fili's lips, kissing him sloppily.

Fili kisses him back, holding him tight. His tongue exploring his brother’s mouth. He feels such a relief that their parents know their secret now and that they have nothing against it. He had been so afraid that that would happen. That their love to each other would tear their wonderful family apart. Instead he now knows an even bigger secret. He smiles into their kiss.

"You still love me, like you said you would," Kili sighs happily. He strokes Fili's soft curls.

“Of course I do!” Fili tries the soft stubble above Kili’s upper lip with his forefinger. “Mum and dad made you a pretty special person.”

"You're special too, Fee," Kili purrs, kissing that finger. "My gorgeous brother."

Fili smiles at the compliment. “Looks like siblings in love make very good parents.” He still can’t get his head around that fact, liking it though. “Are you okay with that now? That they’re brother and sister?” He lets his finger wander down to that slightly scratchy jawline.

"I think so," Kili says softly, not really wanting to talk about mum and dad right now."It makes things easier for us too. And dad said that I am not a freak because of it.” He snuggles himself even closer. “I am just happy that you love me,” he smiles, closing his eyes.

Fili actually wants to turn him on his back, lean over him and devour him really passionately. But he doesn’t do it. It still has to wait. “I love you, little brother.” Fili kisses those closed eyelids. “I’m really very much in love with you, you know.” He sighs, both hands stroking through Kili’s hair. “It’s like I’ve searched and searched and I finally found my other half, who was there beside me all along.”

Kili chuckles softly. “You are such a softie, Fee. But am really in love with you too, big brother. Now shush and let’s sleep,” he grins, burying his face in his brother’s pyjama top, feeling simply content and relieved how things have turned out.

_Sleep?! With you cuddled into my side like this? Your warmth spreading through me. Your breath hot through my shirt. Your sexy, wild hair tickling my nose. And your crotch...pressed so tightly against my thigh…_

Fili pulls himself together, stroking Kili’s back soothingly.

 _Not yet._ He smiles. _Soon. But I can wait, my precious little one._  


	8. Sweet Sixteen

As soon as the last of his birthday guests had left the house, Kili turns around to his brother, grinning widely. “Just us now,” he bites his lip as he straddles him on the sofa. Their parents had been so good to make themselves scarce for the evening so Kili could throw a proper sweet sixteenth for his friends and they had promised not to be back until half eleven. Of course it had been a little sneaky that Kili had told his guests they had to be out of the door by ten thirty, but no-one would need to know about that little white lie. He had been patient enough. Almost a full year they had been on their best behaviour. Well, mostly … Sure they had fondled under the covers on a number of occasions. But Fili had kept his promise to Thorin and they had not gone any further than that.

“I am sixteen now,” he reinforces the point to his big brother as he kisses him hard.

Fili snorts, grabbing his hips and holding him in place. “And that means what exactly?”

“Tease,” Kili frowns, biting his earlobe softly. “You know what that means.” He lets his tongue trail down his brother’s neck as he rolls his hips a little to rub his growing excitement against Fili.

“You mean you know I’ve been half hard during half of the day, waiting for _this?”_ With that Fili flips them so Kili is beneath him, and he grinds his equally filling erection into his little brother’s still clothed groin. “Or maybe make that half of last year?” He looks into those big brown orbs, seeing the lust flare in them.

Kili groans. “Tell me about it!” He lets his hands roam eagerly down his brother’s back, kissing him sloppily. “These have been the longest twelve months. And ‘though this was an awesome party, I really wished for them to go for about the last two hours,” he moans softly. “Want you so bad, big bro,” he sighs into another deep kiss.

Fili plunges his tongue into his little brother’s mouth as far as it will go, feeling like his body is catching fire. “We’d better go to a bed, in case they’ll be home early?” he pants, nibbling on Kili’s now fully grown stubble, his hands all over his body, roaming the still slender form.

Kili is up like a spear, grabbing his brother’s hand and already dragging him towards Fili's bedroom. “You think they’d be mad if they find out? We said we’d wait until I was sixteen,” he chatters as he pulls Fili after him up the stairs. “Which we have!”

“I hope they won’t... _They_ obviously did it together the first time when mum was... Can’t do the math right now.” He grins, sitting on the bed and pulling Kili close towards him. “You really want us to do those things we saw?” He looks up unsurely, feeling so much responsibility, it almost kills his mood.

“Hell yeaheah!” Kili almost rips Fili’s shirt from his chest, grinding down hard against him as he straddles him again. “Why? Don’t you?” he cocks his head, his dark hair falling into his eyes as always.

"Oh god of course!" Fili's hands slip into the waistband of Kili's skinny jeans, huffing frustrated when he doesn't get very far. "I guess we already have trouble to decide who's on top." He snorts when he finds himself on his back again, hard-on rubbing harshly up against Kili's. He wants to drown in those big brown eyes.

"It's _my_ birthday," Kili grins cheekily. He pushes himself upright on Fili's lap to unbutton his jeans. He bites his lip as he looks at Fili's gorgeous flushed face. "Touch me, brother."

Fili is already fully hard when Kili utters these words. He slides his hands beneath his brother's t-shirt and ever so slowly pulls it off, loving every inch of that hot skin. All the while holding Kili's gaze. Then he rubs his palms wantonly across that growing bulge in those too tight jeans, pulling the zipper down. "I can't believe I'm finally allowed to do this, little brother." He pulls Kili down to kiss him hard, panting, "I had such a hard time not to."

Kili laughs at his brother. "I had a _hard_ time too," he chuckles against his lips. "And I'm having a _very_ _hard_ time right now. Let's get naked. Want to feel all of you finally, gorgeous Fee."

As Kili steps off him, Fili slips his brother's trousers and boxers down as fast as he can as well as his own, mouth-watering as he properly lies eyes on his brother's cock for the first time without feeling guilty. "Finally," he sighs and takes that gorgeous dick into his hands, fisting him tightly, taking Kili’s mouth into a forceful kiss. His free hand creeps around to squeeze Kili’s well-formed arse.

"Mmm, would love to just play with you all night," Kili hums happily. "But we probably should hurry up if we don't want mum and dad to walk in on us doing _it_." He reaches between his brother's legs to fondle his stones gently, feeling the soft skin pulled tight around them, and then moves his hand up to his thick dick, wrapping his hand around the base. "Love your gorgeous cock," he purrs.

Fili groans loudly. They’ve jerked each other off before but always in a hurry, never really having time to enjoy it in slow motion. “Playing all night sounds fun…” Fili awkwardly moves onto the bed again without letting go of Kili, lying on his side facing his sexy brother. “Remember, we read…” He peppers Kili’s chest with tiny kisses, “not to hurry the first  time…” He looks up, “I don’t want to hurt you, little one.”  

"Who says you get to top?" Kili grins his sweet wide smile as he kisses his way down his brother's body until his horny smell tickles his nostrils. He grins even more as he presses a tentative kiss against his thick rod. His own cock is throbbing pleasantly. "You're so sexy, Fee. Want to do you so bad," he murmurs again.

“You...you want to…” Fili almost bites his own tongue as he feels Kili’s lips against his cock and he bucks against it, already losing his nerve. “God, Kee…” he threads his fingers through those long dark strands of hair. “I’m...I’m as much a virgin as you are there…” He trails off, enjoying the enthusiasm of his brother immensely.

"Do you trust me, brother? I'll be real gentle." He _needs_ to have sex with him like _now_! Waiting had been so very difficult. He'd tried to convince his brother a few times that another month, another week, another day wasn't going to matter but Fili would not budge, saying that they'd made a promise and it was going to be even more special if they would wait.  

He sucks his finger into his mouth and brings it to behind Fili's sack, feeling carefully for that special place. He'd enough times fingered himself over the past few months, wanting to know what it would feel like to the both of them. But as he gently strokes over that little pucker it’s still a thousand times more exciting to touch his brother there so intimately than playing with himself.

“Keee!” Fili feels electricity shoot through his whole body at the very intimate touch. “That’s…” He wriggles his ass to get more of it. “Feels wonderful, more!” He’d done it to himself, trying out things after they’d done research, but having Kili’s finger there makes his cock twitch in anticipation.

"Oh brother... " Kili loves those wanton wails falling from his brother's lips. He reaches over to grab the bottle of lube they'd bought last weekend in anticipation of today. He slicks his fingers in the gel like substance and carefully pushes his brother's leg up. "Want to make you feel amazing."

“ _Please!”_ Fili begs unashamedly. “And here I th...thought…” He rolls his eyes back when he feels the cool fingers against his most private spot. “That I’d be the one…” He can’t speak, doesn’t want to speak, only one coherent sentence before he wants to lose control. “ _I love you, Kee.”_

"Gorgeous brother, love you so much," Kili winks as he pushes against that muscle and slides his finger into his brother's heat. "You feel so soft inside. So hot," he pants, kissing the back of Fili's leg. "Does it feel okay?"

“Nggg... _very!”_ Fili loves the tightness he feels, like his brother is reaching for things he never could before and now can. He automatically clenches his muscles. “Good!!” he breathes through his nose and exhales slowly. “Can’t...can’t I somehow do it to you too? Want you to know how wonderful it is…” Fili licks his lips, wanting to share as they always share everything.

"Yes!" Kili beams, burning from every cell in his body for his brother's touch. "Wanna suck you too, Fee." He carefully pulls back his finger and moves himself around, pulling up his leg around his brother's torso. "Damn you're so sexy." He knows this should feel wrong wanting to do this with his half-brother. But he just cannot imagine doing this with anyone else. He trusts Fili with every part of his being, _wants_ him to touch him everywhere.

"I want to feel every part of you, little one, everything." he reaches for the lube and coats his own fingers with the gel. Then laying himself down again facing Kili's hard-on. He licks the glistening slit, so very tempting!

"Oh fuck yes fuck oh again!" Kili bucks instantly against this delicious touch. "Your finger... Inside too... Please... Fee." He does just that, prodding that lovely star with his fingers again as he carefully sucks the tip of that beautiful manhood into his warm mouth.

"Keee...oh..Kee! Oh yes!" Fili just has to voice his pleasure as that agile tongue swirls so eagerly around his crown. He circles his middle finger around Kili's rose the same way before ever so gently pressing it inside an inch, sucking Kili's cock into his mouth more fully.

If it wasn't for his brother's full shaft filling his mouth Kili would utter a whole stream of debauchery at that overwhelming pleasure. All of this feels so good, even better than it had in all his dirty dreams, in his wildest fantasies. He struggles not to push his hips forward, wanting more, deeper, harder! "Fee!" he groans awkwardly. He loves how his brother tastes. Not at all how he had expected. Nothing like his own juices.   

Fili sucks and fingers his brother more forcefully now, getting carried away with his passion. He moans around Kili's cock, pushing his own a little further into that delicious mouth. And Kili's finger...so deep, pushing in and drawing back in a real fast pace now. His whole body is humming and singing with pleasure.

"S-stop!" Kili gasps suddenly, dropping Fili from his mouth with a pop. He draws in a real deep breath as he desperately tries to keep his orgasm at bay, not wanting to lose it before he's even been inside his brother. He forces his brain to think of maths and cauliflower and anything else he can think of that he doesn't like when to his relief Fili lets go of his throbbing cock. "Too close..." he pants.

"T...too...late!" Fili warns but comes all the same when Kili's finger had struck what probably was the so called pleasure button all over gay websites. "Oggghddd..." he groans, shaking like a whole heap of leaves.

Kili is a little surprised when the warm splash of cum lands on his face. But then he grins as he continues to finger his brother through his quivering peak. He sticks out his tongue to lick the warm juice off his lips and then runs his tongue over Fili's wet tip.

Fili groans really loudly at that. That finger in his ass...He withdraws his from Kili's hot channel and pants. "Fuck me, little brother. Need to feel that gorgeous dick of yours inside me..." He rolls on his back and spreads his legs wide, wantonly, needy. No one must see him like this but his brother.

“Yes! Oh sweet Fee, I want to, I want to so much!” He stares down at his big brother for a moment, displayed so beautifully for him, so willingly giving himself to him. He knows he has to take it easy, they had talked about that, they had learnt that together these last few months when they had looked into having butt sex. But his need is rushing through him like a raging torrent now and he leans over his brother, grinning a dirty smile at him. “So sexy, Fee. You are so hot!” He rubs the tip of his cock between his brother’s cheeks, barely able to contain himself.

"Try it. I know there should be two fingers but..hmmm..." Fili grabs for the lube again and holds it out to Kili. "Lots of this, please."

Kili bites his bottom lip as he coats his dick and Fili’s entrance in the cold substance. “You sure? I can do another finger …” he offers, although he silently pleads for Fili to say no to that, so hard is he right now.

Fili shakes his head, “Your cock…show me.” Fili gasps, pulling himself apart as good as he can, trying to relax, staring at his beautiful younger sibling, completely mesmerised. Kili’s hair is wild, sweat shining on his forehead which he furrows in concentration. “Please Kee…”

“Just … just relax,” Kili whispers, suddenly feeling nervous. _What if I do it wrong? I don’t want to hurt him!_ He closes his eyes just a moment, ordering himself to relax too. _It’s going to feel great!_ When he opens them again and sees his sweet brother smile so beautifully back at him he feels love glow inside him. True love. He knows so in his very core.

He grabs his cock in hand and very carefully moves the tip against that sweet pink rose again. “Tell me when to stop,” he makes Fili promise and then pushes forward a little.

Fili hisses in pain without wanting to. _It’s so much! Breathe, they said. Relax your muscles - What muscles?_ He looks at Kili and whispers. “It’s...I need to adjust...You feel _big!”_ He smiles nervously.

Kili can feel his cheeks burn at that. He looks down and finds his cock buried about a third between Fili’s globes. “So hot and tight you are, brother,” he whispers back, holding still. “Jesus, you grip me so hard.” He strokes Fili’s thighs gently, trying very hard not to move despite his own desires. “You look so goddamn beautiful like this, Fee,” he tries to encourage.

“We...we should have tried the dildos…” Fili bites his lips and screws his eyes shut. In his heart he wants to be joined with his brother but somehow his body doesn’t agree with that.

“No, no, sssh, sweet brother, it’s okay,” Kili coos softly, not wanting to abandon this treat now that they have come so far. “We will take it slow. Just … just tell me when to move. I won’t move until you tell me, lovely Fee.” He reaches for his brother’s now softened cock again, remembering that that will help his partner to relax. “So gorgeous, brother. Thank you for doing this with me. Feels really nice on my cock.”

“D..Does it?” Fili looks at Kili again, loving those soft, yet strong hands on his privates. “Tell me...how it feels?”

“Really hot, brother. Very tight. So special to be inside you. Want … want to come inside you,” he utters, knowing he shouldn’t push his brother for more, but feeling almost desperate now!

“Can you kiss me?”

“Yes, of course!” Kili moves himself forward so that he can press his lips against his brother’s, seeing him wince a little. “Is it really that bad?” he whispers softly, nervously.

“Kiss me, Kee. Come in me…” Fili pants. The forward movement somehow eased the pain a bit and he feels Kili move a little further inside. He grabs for his head and devours him wildly, concentrating on the delicious rub of their tongues and not his stretched ass.

“Oh god, Fee!” Kili mumbles into his brother’s mouth. Those naughty words and the drag of his cock deeper into that amazing tight heat is so overwhelming that it only takes him one tiny little forward push and he tumbles right over the edge into oblivion “Fuck!” he groans loudly as he comes inside his brother, trying very hard not to thrust but finding it almost impossible to keep his brain cells in any sensible order as his body is flooded with so much pleasure.

Fili’s eyes fly open as he feels the hot fluid rush into him. “Oh Kee!! Oh GOD!” With the juice within he somehow is able to accommodate the thrusts better and he meets them halfway. Pressure, pain and pleasure all very closely together. But definitely a mind blowing experience. He pulls Kili down for more deep kissing.

Kili opens his mouth to say something, but he finds he just needs to try and pull some air into his lungs in between their snogs before he rests himself down heavily onto his brother’s warm body, panting as his heart races inside his chest. _Wow. That was wow!_ He closes his eyes as he feels Fili’s arms around him. He is softening a little now, but still inside that deliciously warm channel, feeling just perfectly one with Fili. Like he was made to be inside him.

Fili chuckles a little, holding his _lover_ tight against his chest _._ “And here I thought you’d be the one to be deflowered today.” He suddenly feels that he _can_ move muscles in his channel as he wants to prevent Kili from slipping out. “Happy sixteenth birthday, sweet little brother,” he whispers into those unruly strands of hair.

At that Kili chuckles softly too. “Thank you for the very best sweet sixteen present ever.” He looks up now, into Fili’s beautiful blue eyes sparkling back at him. “Did you enjoy it in the end?” he asks softly.

“Very.” He pecks Kili’s lips, “And I think we need _lots_ of practice.” He feels a little empty as Kili slips out of him. “Because I want to spoil you like this too. If you want to?” Fili asks hopefully.

“Oh yes please,” Kili smiles, running his hand into Fili’s sweaty curls. “Next time I want to feel you inside of me. I want to know what it feels like. And I want you to know what it feels like to be top cuz it was just the most amazing feeling!” he beams excitedly.

Fili grins. “You know, being bottom with you was so much better than being top with a girl.” He reaches out to stroke Kili’s flushed cheeks, as he sees him wince at his comment. “Oh my god, so sorry if that came out the wrong way!” He moves up and softly kisses those rosy lips again. “What I mean is, I _never ever_ want to be with a girl again, only with you my beloved.”

Kili smiles a little shyly and snuggles back into Fili's embrace. "There is never going to be anyone else for me," he murmurs against Fili's chest. "I love you, Fee. I'm so in love with you."

Fili hopes that this will be true. “I’m in love with you too, little one. You make me happy.” He cuddles his brother close, pulling the duvet over them, not caring if their parents will look into Kili’s room and he won’t be there. Kili’s sixteenths birthday was the mark and they waited long enough. Their parents may have to get used to them sleeping together in one bed again like to used to when they were little. Well … perhaps not quite like that anymore now … Fili grins and sighs happily, nuzzling his nose into those brown locks and falls asleep peacefully for the first time in a year.

+++

The house is completely silent when Thorin and Dis arrive back home. As they walk into the living room they find the abandoned glasses and bowls of crisps and popcorn and Thorin shakes his head as he turns off the television that is still playing.

He turns to his sister, exchanging a silent observation with her. Over the last few months they had both abandoned the hope that the boys' crush was just something fleeting. They only seemed to become more smitten with each other as the months went on and on few occasions recently he had walked in on them snogging, having to cough awkwardly as he tried to get past them to get to the fridge or grab his paper.  

Dis smiles, sneaking her arms around Thorin's waist. "Well, we saw that one coming, didn't we?” She looks up into his concerned eyes, pressing herself against his still athletic body, wishing she had had the same courage at her sixteenth birthday to seduce her big brother. She dismisses the thought though since she is happy now regardless. "You still think it's not a good idea?"

"A good idea that my sixteen year old son and twenty year old stepson are having sex under our roof?" Thorin grumbles. He sighs at Dis' reprimanding look. "It does not really matter if I do or not," he says kissing the top of her head. "We both know the rest of the world will not think it a good idea at all." He pushes up her chin to gaze in her eyes. "But I also know two other people who were stubborn enough to flip the world the finger because they knew that their love was real no matter what anyone else said. And who are very happy for it." He smiles widely at her, caressing her face.

“Right.” She tiptoes and kisses his silver beard. “For exactly that reason I still, at fifty six, feel like that sixteen year old girl, big brother.“ She kisses him softly. “We just need to remind them to first clean their own mess.” Dis indicates to the chaos of the party, “And second, to not show their affection in public as much as they might want to.” She sighs.

"Yes, you're right. I will do this once," he sighs, starting to gather the glasses, "since it's Kili's birthday. Why don't you have a nice bath as I do this and then we can cuddle in bed? I'll talk to the boys tomorrow."  

“You are the best.” Dis smiles and walks up the stairs quietly. First she opens the door to Kili’s room but of course it is empty. _Boys, boys..._ She thinks and shakes her head fondly. At Fili’s door she listens intently first before she softly knocks. When there is no answer she opens it, trying to make no sound. She knows she shouldn’t do it but a tiny part of her is still worried that they’re drunk so she has a look.

Tears spring to her eyes as she sees the picture of love in the dim light of the moon. Her little Kili is draped across his big brother, face nuzzled into his hair and neck, arms around his upper body, while Fili’s arms are around him. One hand cradling his head gently. Her older son is smiling in his sleep. The duvet might be draped over them but it doesn’t hide that they’re naked underneath as it has ridden down to their waists.

She can’t stifle a happy sob as she turns around to go when a soft, “Thank you mum.” interrupts her mid stride and she turns back to look into Fili’s bright blue eyes. “Thank you for my brother,” he says, voice hoarse from sleep, smiling at her gratefully.

She smiles back warmly waiting for him to fall asleep again.

+++

When he has finished cleaning the after party mess Thorin quietly climbs the stairs. He can see no light coming from under the bathroom door and thinks that perhaps Dis was too tired for a bath and has gone straight to bed. But as he is about to push open their bedroom door, he notes her standing in the doorway to Fili’s room. He step up behind her, glancing into the room with a small smile around his lips as he finds his boys sleeping peacefully in each other other’s arms. And despite his misgivings of them following in their parents’ footsteps of choosing this forbidden path he has to admit that they look happy together.

“They look so very peaceful.” Dis says when she closes the door, looking at Thorin, caressing the frown on his forehead. “They’ll make their way, please stop your worrying.” She pulls his head down towards hers, putting their foreheads together. “Just as we did.”

“I hope so. Let’s go to bed,” Thorin kisses her forehead, smiling back at her. He throws one last glance over his shoulder at the two young lovers. And with a soft smile he pulls the door closed behind him.   


End file.
